The REAL State of teh Union...

masteen · Post by **masteen** » February 4, 2003, 11:58 pm

You will kneel before Dubya

Acies · Post by **Acies** » February 5, 2003, 6:59 pm

WTF...
That is pretty impressive Masteen

Metanis · Post by **Metanis** » February 5, 2003, 7:34 pm

I especially enjoyed the store...

I'm gonna order a 1,000 of them and give them to all my redneck friends!

Dregor Thule · Post by **Dregor Thule** » February 5, 2003, 7:58 pm

I need a sugar daddy who will send me one of these:

http://www.cafeshops.com/cp/prod.aspx?p ... se.3924476

Lalanae · Post by **Lalanae** » February 5, 2003, 8:01 pm

Screw the mug. I'm wearing these to Fan Faire:

http://www.cafeshops.com/cp/prod.aspx?p ... se.3927856

Edit: OMG!!!!! So many to choose!!
http://www.cafeshops.com/cp/store.aspx? ... ouse.32436

Dregor Thule · Post by **Dregor Thule** » February 5, 2003, 8:04 pm

Sweet Jesus, I'm dying here.

Krurk · Post by **Krurk** » February 5, 2003, 8:16 pm

Unrelated to above site but still a good read

http://www.idleworm.com/nws/2002/11/iraq2.shtml

kyoukan · Post by **kyoukan** » February 5, 2003, 8:33 pm

I got the GOP Girl thong.

noel · Post by **noel** » February 5, 2003, 8:45 pm

If I'm removing a girls pants/skirt, and I see a picture of George Bush on her thong, I'm out of there.

Sirensa · Post by **Sirensa** » February 5, 2003, 8:54 pm

Aranuil wrote:If I'm removing a girls pants/skirt, if I see a picture of George Bush on her thong, I'm out of there.

Cheaper than a chastity belt and far more comfortable.

masteen · Post by **masteen** » February 6, 2003, 12:40 am

Blumgan · Post by **Blumgan** » February 6, 2003, 1:12 am

Thanks to the AOL translater....I give you the State of the Union

DA 203 STAET OF DA UNION ADR3S COMPL3TE TRANSCRIPT OF PR3SIEDNT BUSHS SPECH 2 CONGRES AND TEH NATION
TEH UNIETD STAETS CAPI2L
WASHNG2N DC1!!1! LOL TEH PRASIEDNT MR11111!!1 OMG WTF SPEAEKR VIEC PRESIEDNT CH3NAY RIGHT3OUS GOP CONGRESM3N SUPR3M3 COURT ACOMPLIECS POLITICALY CONVENEINT GUESTS CAVITY-S3ARCHED CITIEZNS

EVARY YEAR BY LAW AND BY CUS2M WE MET HERA FOR A PHO2-OP TAHT RAQUIERS AL OF U OUT THEIR 2 BOUNC3 UP AND DOWN MOR3 OFT3N THAN A PAK OF CATHOLICS AT HIGH MAS11!1!!1 OMG WTF LOL THIS YAAR AS WE GATHER TEH ANTIER UNIETD STAETS GOVARNMENT 2G3THER IN THIS ONE CHMBR LAT US TAEK SOLAEC IN TEH KNOWLADGE TAHT I HAEV DISPATCH3D ATORNEY GENERAL ASHCROFT 2 TEH SHADOW WHIET HOUS3 FROM WHAR3 HA WIL SNGL3-HANDADLY COMBAT GLOBAL INDECENCY IN TEH AV3NT W3 R AL VAPORIEZD IN A HORIFIC NUK3YULAR CATASTROPH3!!1! WTF LOL

NOW AS MOST OF U KNOW I DONT GIEV MANY PRES CONF3R3NCAS11!!1 OMG WTF AL THOSE HARD FACT-CRAZY QU3STIONS AND SPONTAENOUS TOKNG TEND 2 DAVIAET FROM MAH PREPAERD SLOGAEN3RNG SOUND BYTES!!1!1 OMG WTF LOL WEL 2NIGHT IL FEL NONE OF TEH STUTER-INDUCNG TEROR OF HAVNG 2 SUDANLY JUST THINK UP WORDS TAHTS NOT SCROLNG DOWN A T3L3PROMPTAR!11!! WTF LOL WHICH IS Y I STAND H3RA NOW BASKNG IN DA ADULATION OF AN AUDEINC3 SO COWER3D BY FEAR OF BNG LAEBL3D UN-M3RICAN BY FOX NEWS COMENTA2RS TAHT TH3Y WUD APLAUD ROSAANE BAR SNGNG DA STAR SPANGLED BANER11!!!! WTF LOL (APLAUSE)1!1!! OMG U CONGRAS PEOPLE SERVA MAH KNGDOM IN A TIEM OF GR3AT CONSAQUANCA 2 DA BUSH DYNASTY1!1! OMG WTF DURNG THIS S3SION OF CONGRES W3 HAEV DA DUTY 2 RAFORM MAH APROVAL RATNGS AT HOM3 - AND WE HAEV TEH OPORTUNITY 2 REDUCAET MILIONS OF LESAR PEOPLAS ABROAD - FRENG THEM FROM DA SCOURGE OF HIGHAR COGNITION11!1! OMG LOL WE WIL WORK FOR A PROSPARITY TAHT IS BROADLY SHAERD BY OUR CMPAGEN CONTRIBU2RS AND W3 WIL MANUFACTUR3 AND SENSATIONALIEZ EVERY DANG3R AND 3VERY MAH TAHT R3NDARS MARICANS PARALYZ3D BY F3AR11!11!11 OMG IN AL TH3SE DAYS OF WARMONGERNG AND 3MPIER-BUILDNG WA CAN B CONFIEDNT111!11 IN A WHIRLWIND OF INJUSTIEC POVERTY AND UNEMPLOYM3NT OUR FATEH IN JESUS CHRIST IS SURE AND MAH R3-AL3CTION PROSPECTS R3MANE STRONG11!!!11 OMG LOL (APLAUSE)!!1!!11 LOL

THIS COUNTRY FAECS MANY CHALENG3S!1!! OMG WTF BUT WA WIL NOT DENY OR PAS ALONG OUR PROBLAMS 2 OTHER CONGR3SES OTH3R PRESIEDNTS AND OTHAR GEN3RATIONS1111! OMG NO WA WIL CONFRONT AND DESTROY TH3M AS QUIKLY AS I WIEPD OUT TAHT MASIEV BUDGET SURPLUS AND S3NS3 OF GLOBAL HARMONY TAHT SO MAR3D DA INITIAL DAYS FOLOWNG MAH CORONATION!1!!1! OMG (APLAUS3)1!1!

DURNG TEH LAST TWO YEARS REPUBLICANS HAEV SEN WUT CAN B ACOMPLISHED WHAN WE EXPLOIT TRAEGDY FOR POLITICAL GANE1111 OMG WTF LOL BY AGRASIEVLY STAKNG A MONOPOLY ON PATRIOTISM WE ACHEIVAD HIS2RIC MID-T3RM 3L3CTION GANES — WHICH MUST NOW B QUIKLY PUT 2 US3 OV3RSTEPNG OUR MANDAET IN 3V3RY SKOOL AND 3V3RY CLASROM SO TAHT AVERY CHILD IN MARICA CAN B SAEVD AND WORSHIP AND PRAY OUT LOUD 2 J3SUS CHRIST ONLY IN MANDA2RY DISPLAYS OF FATEH!!!11 OMG LOL (APLAUSE)!1!1111! LOL

2 PROTACT OUR COUNTRY WA R3ORGANIEZD OUR GOV3RNM3NT AND CR3AETD DA DAPARTMENT OF HOM3LAND S3CURITY — WHICH IS MOBILIZNG AGANEST DA THRAAT OF CIVIL LIEBRTEIS111!11! WTF LOL 2 BRNG OUR MAH OUT OF RAC3SION WA SIMPLY STAETD TAHT IT HAPENED AND R3SUMED D3LIEVRNG UNIMAGINABLY MASIEV TAX BREAKS 2 OUR PALS FROM DA 19TH HOLE1!11!1!1 OMG WTF 2 3STABLISH TEH ILUSION OF INTAGRITY IN MERICAN BUSIENS WE PASAD PAEPR TIEGR RAFORMS AND WE R WATENG FOR DA S2RM 2 BLOW OVER!1!1! OMG WTF LOL

SOME MIGHT CAL THIS A GOD RACORD!111!! SOMA MIGHT B WRONG11!1! ITS A FANTASTIC RECORD1!11 OMG LOL HEL ITS SO GOD TAHT 3VAN IF I DONT DO ANOTH3R THNG FOR TEH NEXT TWO YAARS AXC3PT MUNCH CHE-2S AND CLEAR-CUT C3DARS ON MAH THOUSAND-ACR3 RANCH ID STIL D3S3RVE 2 B RE-ELACT3D BY A BIG3R LANDSLIED THAN MAH DADY BUREID TAHT LITL3 GREK W3AESL MICHA3L DA-COK-AS1!1!1! WTF (APLAUSE)11!1!! OMG

GONG FORWARD OUR FIRST GOAL IS CL3AR W3 MUST TOK ABOUT TEH MAH LOUDLY AND OFTEN ANOUGH TAHT DA GR3AT UNWASHAD COM3 2 BLEIV3 WE HONESTLY R WH3THAR OR NOT THEY HAEV LOUSY BLU3-COLAR JOBS EARNNG TEH MINIMUM WAEG WE FIGHT 2TH-AND-NALE 2 KEP FROM RASENG EVARY FIEV YEARS OR SO1!11!11! OMG LOL (APLAUSE)!111! LOL

AS WE CONTINUA 2 WAATHAR R3CASION TERORIST ATAKS CORPORAET SCANDALS AND AN OUTRIGHT S2K MARK3T IMPLOSION WE CAN SAY OUR MAH IS RECOVERNG — IN TEH SM3 WAY WA MANAEG 2 TAL COLORED FOLKS WE RESPECT THAM WITHOUT CRAKNG UP!!!!11!! WIT UNEMPLOYMANT STIL SKYROKETNG OUR NATION NEDS MORE MAJOR CORPORATIONS 2 B DACLAERD TAX-EXEMPT SO THAY CAN 3XPAND THERE UNINSUR3D PART-TIEM WORKFORC3S AND PUT UP MORA SIGNS TAHT R3AD JANI2RS WANTED11!1!111 OMG WTF (APLAUS3)!!!1!! OMG WTF LOL

IM PROPOSNG TAHT AL DA INCOM3 TAX RADUCTIONS FOR RICH FOLKS SET FOR 204 AND 206 B MAED PERMAENNT AND 3FACTIEV THIS YEAR1!11 WTF LOL NIENTY-TWO MILION MARICANS WIL KEP — THIS YAAR — AN AEVRAEG OF ALMOST $110 MOR3 OF THEYRE OWN MON3Y!!!! OMG WTF OF COURS3 TAHTS JUST AN AEVRAEG111111 IF DIK CHENEY AND A DOZAN PENIELS CRAK WHOR3S R RIDNG A MERY-GO-ROUND 2G3TH3R TAHT STIL M3ANS DA AEVRAEG PERSON ON TAHT RIG IS WORTH ABOUT FOURTEN GAZILION DOLARS!!11! OMG AND THEYRE LEIS DA GLORIOUS LOGIC OF MAH ADMINISTRATIONS STRAETGY 2 POSITIEVLY INFLUENCE ECONOMIC INDICA2RS WITHOUT ACTUALY HELPNG DA LITLE PAOPL311!1 OMG (APLAUS3)1!!! LOL

WA WIL ALSO IGNORE DA ADVIEC OF 3VAN OUR OWN REPUBLICAN 3CONOMISTS ELIMINATNG DA TAX ON S2K PROFITS1!1!!1 OMG LOL INDED D3SPIET WUT CRYBABY POR-BOY DEMOCRATS MIGHT SAY THIS PLAN WIL BNEFIT MIDLE AND LOWER-MIDLE-AFLUENT CITIEZNS WHO NOT ONLY KNOW WUT DIVIEDNDS R IN TEH FIRST PLAEC BUT R ALSO DA INSIEDRS WHO ACTUALY RECEIEV AND PAY TAEXS ON THEM DURNG DA WORST BAR MARKET SINCE TEH GREAT DEPRASION!!11! OMG WTF (APLAUSE)!1!1!!1!

OUR SACOND GOAL IS TOKNG ABOUT HIGH QUALITY AFORDABLA HAALTH R FOR AL M3RICANS WHIEL STIL MANETANENG DA STATUS QUO AS D3MANDED BY OUR CMPAGEN-SUPORTNG PALS IN DA INSURANCE INDUSTRY11!! OMG WTF LOL TEH MERICAN SYSTEM OF MEDICIEN IS A MODEL OF PRIVATIZATION UNFET3RED — WIT A DAZLNG ABILITY 2 MON3TIEZ SUFERNG AND AD VALUABL3 PROPERTEIS 2 TEH REAL 3STAET PORTFOLIOS OF R 3XECUTIEVS!1!1! LOL OF COURSE THEIR R LOTS OF FOLKS OUT THEIR WHO CANT AFORD THERE OWN INSURANCA!11!! OMG 2 THEM I SAY NAVER MIND TAHT DA GOP ROUTIENLY BLOKS ANY 3FORT TAHT MIGHT P3RMIT TEH ALMIGHTY UNIETD STAETS 2 SHAD ITS STATUS AS DA RICHEST WAST3RN NATION TAHTS STIL 2 CH3AP 2 PROVIED MEDICIEN 2 ITS CITIEZNS!11!1! OMG WTF NO INSTAAD U SHUD NOD AND SMIEL AS I MAEK VAGUA FEL-GOD R3FERENC3S 2 A NON-EXISTENT PLAN 2 SOMADAY SOM3HOW G3T U AND UR FMILY SOM3 BAER-BONES INSURANCE SO U DONT HAEV 2 KEP GIVNG UR BABEIS HOMEMAED P3NICILIN U SCRAEPD OUT OF DA CORNER OF UR BAESMANTS SUMP PUMP1111!!1 OMG LOL (APLAUSE)1!!!1!! WTF

OF COURSE H3ALTH R RAFORM MUST BGIN WIT MEDICAER WHICH 2NIGHT I WIL REF3R 2 AS DA BINDNG COMITM3NT OF A CARNG SOCEITY1!!11 OMG WTF TRUTH IS ITS SOCIALIST M3DICIEN FOR OLD PAOPL3 S3T UP BY TAHT DARKEI-LOVNG PATH3TIC EXCUS3 FOR A T3XAS PR3SIEDNT NMED LYNDON O!!!1!!! OMG AS SUCH I RILLY AND TRULY STAND DIMATRICALY OPOS3D 2 IT BUT B/C L3GIONS OF CRUSTY GERIATRICS LIEK IT SO MUCH IT WUD B PUR3 POLITICAL SUICIED FOR M3 2 STAET OUTRIGHT TAHT MAH TRU3 GOAL IS 2 INCR3MENTALY OBLIETRAET R OV3R TIEM1!1! OMG WTF LOL AND SO FOR NOW W3 MUST CREAET TEH ILUSION OF SUPORTNG THIS PROGRM BY GIVNG S3NIORS ACES 2 TEH PREVENTIEV MADICIEN THEY DASERVE11!1!!1 LOL (APLAUSE)!1!!

FINALY 2 PROTECT OUR HEALTH R INSURANCE COMPANEIS WE MUST ADRAS ONE OF TEH PRIEM CAUSES OF THEYRE DISPL3ASURE — DA THRAAT OF CLAS-ACTION SUITS IN CAESS OF GROS NEGLIEGNC3 INCOMPETENC3 AND/OR 3THICAL ATROCITEIS COMITED IN DA RAL3NTLAS PURSUIT OF PROFITS OVER H3ALNG1!!11! OMG WTF LOL YES SUNG CROK3D HOSPITALS AND PHARMAECUTICAL AND INSURANCE COMPANEIS IS TEH REAL R3ASON POR FOLKS CANT GAT INSURANCA11!! LOL AND AS COINCIEDNCE WUD HAEV IT SENA2R O EDWARDS US3D 2 LITIGAET CLAS-ACTION MEDICAL MALPRACTIEC LAWSUITS1!111 OMG WTF LOL Y3S SANA2R O 3DWARDS IS DIERCTLY R3SPONSIBL3 FOR EVARY UNINSUR3D MAN WOMAN AND CHILD IN TEH UNIETD STAETS OF MARICA!111 WTF LOL DID I M3NTION HES RUNNG FOR PRESIEDNT?!?!!!? OMG LOL

OUR THIRD GOAL IS 2 TOK ABOUT PROMOTNG ENARGY INDEP3NDENC3 FOR OUR COUNTRY WHIEL DRMATICALY IGNORNG DA ENVIRONM3NT11111 LOL

I HAEV SENT DA CONGRES AN AN3RGY PLAN TAHT GIEVS EMPTY LIP SERVIEC 2 EN3RGY AFICEINCY CONSERVATION AND TEH DEV3LOPM3NT OF CLEAENR T3CHNOLOGY WHIEL STIL MANETANENG MAH FMILYS SLAVISH AND UNBLEIVABLY PROFITABLE DEVOTION 2 ARAB OIL111!! OMG LOL I HAEV SENT U LEGISLATION CALAD CLEAR SKEIS TAHT LETS POW3R PLANTS DALAY CLEANNG UP THEYRE AMISIONS INDEFINIETLY UNTIL SUCH UNDARMINAET TIEM AS NU TECHNOLOGEIS R INVENT3D!!!!!!11 OMG WTF LOL SIMILARLY I HAEV SANT U LAGISLATION CALAD HEALTHY FORESTS TAHT WIL PRAVENT FUTURA GRAS AND BRUSH FIERS BY CUTNG DOWN THOUSAND YAAR OLD TRES AND PR3SERVNG THEM AS ATRACTIEV MAS-PRODUCAD DINNG ROM SETS11111!11 OMG LOL (APLAUS3)!1!1 OMG WTF LOL

I URGE U 2 PAS THASE MEASURAS FOR TEH GOD OF MAH PERSONAL FORTUN3!!1!1!1 OMG WTF LOL AVAN MORE I ASK U 2 JOIN WIT ME BREIFLY IN PRETENDNG 2 S3T ASIED OUR SHAERD CONTEMPT FOR TEH ENVIRONM3NT!111!!1 OMG LOL AND TAHTS Y 2NIGHT IM PROPOSNG $12!111 WTF BILION IN RESAARCH FUNDNG TAHT WIL N3VAR MAEK IT THROUGH CONGR3S SO TAHT MERICA CAN L3AD DA WORLD IN TOKNG ABOUT DAVELOPNG UNSAEF HYDROGAN CARS AND PARSONAL JAT PAKS!!1!11 OMG WTF LOL Y3S W3 ENT3R DA REALM OF SCEINCA FICTION 2 S3T TRE-HUGERS AND STAR TR3K FRAAKS HEARTS A-FLUTER WIT POSIBILITEIS!1!!11 PLUS - MAH BOYS IN BIG OIL SAY TAHTL THROW THAM LIEBRALS OF THEYRE BLAK GOLD SCENT FOR AWHIEL!11!11 WTF (APLAUSA)!11!11! OMG

OUR FOURTH GOAL IS 2 FAIGN COMPASION 2WARDS DA TROUBLED NON-RICH OF M3RICA!!111!1 WTF FOR SO MANY IN OUR COUNTRY — TEH HOMALES TEH FATH3RL3S TEH ADICT3D — TEH NED IS BOTOMLESLY 3XP3NSIEV AND ANOYNG1!!1! OMG Y3T THEYRE IS POW3R — 3LECTION-WINNG POW3R — IN TEH W3ALTH MANIPULATIEVN3S AND HYPOCRISY OF ORGANIEZD RELIGION1!1!!111 OMG I URG3 U 2 SHATER DA SAPARATION OF CHURCH AND STAET BY PASNG TEH UNIETD STAETS D3PARTM3NT OF FATEHS MANY CHRISTLY INITIATIEVS WHICH USE TAXPAEYR DOLARS 2 SUPORT LOAEDD ACTS OF COMPASION TAHT CAN METHODICALY CONV3RT M3RICA 2 CHRISTIANITY ONE H3ART AND ONA SU AT A TIEM!1!1!1 WTF (APLAUS3)!1!! OMG

ANOTHAR CAUSA OF HOPAL3SN3S IS ADICTION 2 DRUGS111!!!! WTF LOL I SP3AK FROM 3XP3REINC3 WHAN I SAY TAHT SWET DELICIOUS DRUGS CAN ALMOST BUT NOT ACTUALY DMAEG A POLITICAL CAER3R AND RADUCE AL TEH RICHNES OF OPULENT WAALTH 2 A SNGLE IMPOTENCY-INDUCNG DASIER11!!!1! OMG LOL AS A GOV3RNM3NT W3 R WORKNG HARD WIT RJ R3YNOLDS LOBYISTS 2 FIGHT O DRUGS BY CUTNG OF SUPLEIS AND RADUCNG DEMAND THROUGH STAPAD UP EXECUTIONS AND DA AGR3SIEV CONSTRUCTION OF BLAK TEN GULAGS!!!1111 OMG Y3T FOR THOSA ALREADY ADICT3D DA SUCASFUL FIGHT AGANEST DRUGS IS AS SIMPL3 AS CH3KNG IN 2 A FUL-PRIECD SUIET AT BTY FORD11!!! WTF (APLAUS3)1!!111!! WTF LOL

SP3AKNG OF FOLKS WHO CUD USE A LEG UP LET US NOT OV3RLOK THOSA NOT MONG US WHO HAEV NOT YET BIFURCAETD SUFICEINTLY 2 HAEV LEGS!11!!111 I ASK U 2 PROT3CT WOMB BOGERS FROM DA VERY MOMANT OF MAN JELY IMPLANTATION AND PAS A BAN ON DA EMOTIONALY-LAEBL3D PARTIAL-BIRTH ABORTION WHICH WIL SARVE AS A FIRST ST3P IN OVERTURNNG RO3 VS1!!1! OMG WAED AND TRANSFORMNG UPITY BROADS BAK IN2 DA WOKNG INCUBA2RS AND NON-SKIM MILK DISPANSERS DA GOD LORD INTENDAD THEM 2 B111!! OMG LOL AND B/C NO SCEINCE SHUD AVAR SEK 2 EXPLANE THNGS TAHT CHURCH3S DONT UND3RSTAND - I ASK U 2 R3AFIRM DA VALIDITY OF DA FLAT-EARTH THEORY BY PASNG A LAW AGANEST TEH RESEARCH-ONLY CLONNG OF C3LULAR M8RIAL!1111!1 TEH QUALITEIS OF GRED AND DOMINATION AT ANY COST TAHT WA STRIEV FOR IN MERICA ALSO D3TERMIEN OUR CONDUCT ABROAD1!11 OMG WTF DA MERICAN FLAG STANDS FOR MORA THAN OUR OMNIPOTENC3 AND QUESTIONABL3 TASTE IN DASIGN1!111! OMG WTF OUR FOUND3RS D3DICAETD THIS COUNTRY 2 TEH CAUSE OF HUMAN DIGNITY — TEH RIGHTS OF AVERY PERSON AND TEH POSIBILITEIS OF EVARY LIEF!11!!!1 OMG QUANET NAVEE IEDAS FROM A TIEM WHEN GROWN M3N WOR3 V3LV3T KNIK3RS FROFY SHIRTS GIRLY WIGS AND MAEKUP1!!! 2DAY UNDER MAH LAAEDRSHIP M3RICA S2RMS OUT IN2 DA WORLD 2 STAEK ITS RIGHTEOUS GOD-GIEVN CLAME OF OWNERSHIP OVER ANYTHNG AND EV3RYTHNG TAHT STRIEKS OUR BADY-EY3D FANCY1!!! WTF (APLAUSE)111111 OMG WTF LOL

AS OUR NATION MOVAS TROPS AND BUYS ALIANCAS 2 MAEK OUR WORLD MOR3 PROFITABLA WE MUST ALSO R3MEMBR OUR CALNG AS A CHRISTIAN NATION 2 TAEK ACTION AGANEST GLOBAL H3ALTH CRIESS ONLY ONCA WA OURSELVES FEL THR3AETNED WITHIN OUR COUNTRY CLUB IVORY 2WERS1111111! WTF LOL SUCH IS DA CAES WIT DA HOMO DIESAES ADES!111!1!1 2DAY ON TEH CONTIENNT OF AFRICA NEARLY 30 MILION CHIMPANZE SODOMIEZRS HAEV TEH ADES VIRUS — INCLUDNG THRE MILION CHILDRAN UND3R DA AEG OF 151!1! OMG LOL THEYRE R WHOLE COUNTREIS IN AFRICA WH3R3 MORA THAN ON3-THIRD OF DA ADULT POPULATION CAREIS DA INF3CTION11!11! OMG WTF LOL AND WHIEL IN M3RICA GOD CONTINUES 2 ONLY KIL FAGS WIT ADES WE RAALIEZ TAHT HE WORKS IN MYST3RIOUS WAYS AND AS SUCH CANOT RUL3 OUT HIS ADES-SPEWNG ANGER WALNG UP AND SPLASHNG ON2 OTH3R STRAGEHTER WHIETR GROUPS!1!1 OMG WTF LOL

AS SUCH 2NIGHT I ASK TEH CONGR3S 2 COMIT $1250 DOLARS OVAR TEH NEXT FIEV YEARS 2 ADES-PROF 2IELT RASEARCH 2 TURN TEH TIED IN FAVOR OF PARSONS NOT Y3T GIEVN THIS SINARS D3ATH SANT3NCE BY GOD!1111! LOL

YES THIS NATION CAN LEAD TEH WORLD IN PATRONIZNG RH32RIC ABOUT SPARNG COLOR3D SAVAEGS FROM A PLAGU3 OF NATUR31!1!1 OMG AND AS WE AL KNOW NATURE IS A CONS3RVATIEV THINK TANK CODE WORD FOR ANVIRONM3NTALIST QUERS WHO G3T HIGH ON MDMA AND PAK FUDG3 BAER-BAK AT PAGAN SEX PARTEIS111111 WTF LOL MARK MAH WORDS WE WIL SAND CHRISTIAN SCEINTISTS BY DA THOUSANDS AND TH3Y WIL SAEV TEH SUS OF THESA UNFORTUNAET HORNY BLAKEIS - JUST BFOR3 THAY DEI OF OF COURSA111!!!1! OMG

AND THIS NATION IS LEADNG DA WORLD IN CONFRONTNG AND D3FAATNG DA MAN-MAED EVIL OF INTERNATIONAL T3RORISM1!11 LOL Y3S THEIR R WHOLE THRE MINUT3 STR3TCHES WH3N OUR CABL3 NEWS CHANELS DO NOT BREATHLESLY REPORT NON-D3TALES ABOUT DA WAR ON T3ROR1!!! LOL U CANT ALWAYS SE OR FEL OR SM3L TERORISM!1!!! LOL BUT TAHT DO3SNT MEAN ITS NOT THEYRE111!!1!1 B/C IT IS1!11!!1 UR NEIGHBOR UR LOCAL BROWN-SKINED 7-1 CASHEIR UR DEMOCRAT CONGR3SMAN - THEIR PROBABLY T3RORISTS!11! OMG LOL AND I THINK I SP3AK FOR AL SUV-DRIVNG D3NIEZNS OF UPSCAEL SUBURBAN ENCLAEVS WH3N I SAY BTER SAEF THAN SORY!1!!1 LOL U SE TEH WAR GOES ON AND W3 R WINNG1!!1 OMG LOL SURE THEIR NO 3VIEDNCA OF TAHT111!! OMG LOL U JUST NED 2 TAEK MAH WORD ON THIS ONE B/C 2 GIEV UP EV3N A SHRED OF INFORMATION WUD JAOPARDIEZ TEH S3CRECY OF OUR GLOBAL SPY SAETLIET SYSTEM WHICH NOBODY OUTSIED MERICA KNOWS AXISTS!!!1 WTF LOL (APLAUSA)!1!11!1 OMG LOL

2 DAET WA HAEV ARESTAD OR OTH3RWIES DEALT WIT MANY KAY COMANDERS OF AL QA3DA!1!1!! OMG WTF TAEK ABU-AL SOM3THNG OF YEMEN!!!!!! HE WAS A SUSPECTED T3RORIST1!11!! WTF LOL A GUILTY MERICAN-KILNG SUSPECTED CUD-B TARORIST11111! LOL HE MIGHT OR MIGHT NOT HAEV PUMPED GAS IN2 THOSA CARS TAHT WARE GOT IN2 BLODY COUS-COUS BY A PR3DA2R DRONA-LAUNCHED H3LFIER MISIEL!1!! WTF WAL OLD ABU 2TALY POP3D HIS PANTS AFT3R TAHT ONE B/C H3 CUD B NEXT!!!1!! OMG LOL YE-HA11!!11! OMG DONT FEAR DA R3AEPR RAGBOY1!11 WTF FEAR G3ORGE W!!!1111 OMG LOL BUSH!11!! OMG (APLAUSE)!!!! OMG LOL

MOR3SO WE CONTINU3 2 MONI2R DA CONVARSATIONS OF ANY AND AL SUSPICIOUS MINORITEIS OR PARSONS WIT VEIWPOINTS DIF3RANT FROM MAH OWN!111 LOL H3AR ME NOW THOSA WHO WISH HARM ON M3RICA OR WISH 2 CHANGE MARICA FOR WORSA OR BTAR SHUT UP OR LEAEV1!!!!! OMG WTF LOL W3RA WATCHNG U BARBRA STR3ISAND111!1111 OMG WTF AND MANY OTH3RS HAEV MAT A DIFER3NT FAET1!!!1 WTF LOL L3TS PUT IT THIS WAY THAY R NO LONGAR A PROBL3M 2 DA UNIETD STAETS AND OUR FREINDS AND ALEIS!11! OMG WTF LOL BY TAHT I MAAN - THAY R DAAD!1!1 OMG DIKS GOT A VAULT WHARA H3 COLACTS TEH BLAACHAD BONES AND OFT3N TIEMS HE LIEKS 2 SWIM AROUND IN TH3M LIEK HES OLD SCROGA MCDUK!1!!!

W3 R WORKNG CLOS3LY WIT OTH3R NATIONS 2 PREVENT FURTH3R ATAKS1!!!!11 OMG LOL MERICA AND COALITION COUNTREIS - LIEK BRITANE QATAR TEXAS A COUPLA OF ISLANDS IN TEH PACIFIC I THINK AND BRITANE HAEV UNCOV3RED AND S2P3D T3RORIST CONSPIRACEIS IN FOREIGN PLAECS AL OVAR DA WORLD BUT ALSO IN BUFALO NU YORK!11111 AND AV3RY SNGLE P3AECFUL CUL-DA-SAC IN MERICA11!1!!! LOL WEVE GOT TEH TERORISTS ON TEH RUN11!!!! OMG WTF LOL WER3 KEPNG THEM ON TEH RUN!!1!11 OMG ONA BY ON3 DA TERORISTS R LAARNNG DA MEANNG OF M3RICAN JUSTIEC!1!!1!1 OMG LOL JUST LIEK AL THAM STUPID RATARDS IN TEH LONA STAR STAET!1!! AS WE FIGHT THIS WAR W3 WIL RAMAMBR WHERE IT BGAN H3R3 IN OUR OWN COUNTRY!11!!1 WTF LOL THIS GOV3RNMENT IS TAKNG UNPRECAD3NT3D MEASURES 2 PROT3CT OUR RICH P3OPL3 FROM THOSA OF L3SER BREDNG AND DAFEND OUR INVASTMENTS BOTH OFSHORE AND ON WAL STRET111! OMG WTF LOL B/C NATIONAL SOVERAIGNTY DONT RILLY M3AN MUCH IF U GOT ENOUGH MONEY 2 LIEV IN A MOUNTANE FORTRAS IN LIEK TAHT RICH WHIET NIRVANA ASP3N!!!! WTF LOL (APLAUS3)1!!1 LOL

WEVA INTENSIFEID SACURITY AT TEH BORD3RS AND PORTS OF ANTRY POSTAD MOR3 THAN 5000 N3WLY TRANEAD FED3RAL SCRENERS IN AREPORTS BGUN INOCULATNG TROPS AND FIRST R3SPOND3RS AGANEST SMALPOX AND R DAPLOYNG TEH NATIONS FIRST EARLY WARNNG NETWORK OF S3NSORS 2 DET3CT BIOLOGICAL ATAK11!!1 OMG WTF LOL AND THIS Y3AR FOR TEH FIRST TIEM WA R BGINNG 2 FEILD A D3FENSE 2 PROTACT THIS NATION FROM A PLAUSIBLE AND RATIONAL HALE OF NUCL3AR MISIELS LAUNCHAD THROUGH A TIEM-BNDNG WORMHOLE BY DA SOVEIT UNION OF TEH 1960S11!1 WTF

I THANK DA CONGRES FOR SUPORTNG THES3 M3ASURES!!11111! OMG I ASK U 2NIGHT 2 AD 2 OUR FUTURA SACURITY WIT A MAJOR RESAARCH AND PRODUCTION EFORT 2 GUARD OUR P3OPL3 AGANEST BIOT3RORISM CALED PROJECT BIOSHEILD!!!1!!!1 WTF WE ALSO CALED IN PROJECT VACINAET WHIETY AND PROJ3CT PARANOIA OPIUM!1!!!!1! OMG WTF LOL BUT BIOSHEILD SOUND3D COLER!!!!11!! LOL (APLAUS3)!1!!11! OMG LOL DA BUDGAT I SAND U WIL PROPOSE ALMOST $6 BILION 2 QUIKLY MAEK AVALEABL3 AF3CTIEV VACIENS AND TR3ATM3NTS AGANEST AEGNTS LIEK ANTHRAX EBOLA PLAGUE AND TEH KOTEIS ON3 CAN CATCH WHIEL SHOPNG AT AN URBAN K-MART!1!1! OMG

SINC3 SEPTEMBR TEH 1TH OUR INTALIEGNCE AND LAW ENFORC3M3NT AEGNCEIS HAEV WORKED MORE CLOSELY THAN 3VER 2 TRAK AND DISRUPT DA TARORISTS!1!1 OMG LOL DA FBI IS IMPROVNG ITS ABILITY 2 ANALYZA INTELIEGNC3 AND IS TRANSFORMNG ITSALF 2 MET NU THR3ATS1!111!1 2NIGHT IM INSTRUCTNG DA LEAEDRS OF DA FBI TEH CIA DA HOMALAND SECURITY AND TEH DAPARTMANT OF DEFENSE 2 DEV3LOP A TARORIST THREAT INTEGRATION CANTAR 2 M3RGA AND ANALYZE AL THRAAT INFORMATION IN A SNGL3 LOCATION111!!1!1 OMG WTF TAHT WAY WHEN A HINDU-LOKNG BIGMOUTH CRAKS A 9/1 JOKE AT A DANYS IN FLORIDA WA CAN TAEK DA TRATEOR DOWN WIT A SNGL3 HEADSHOT WHAN H3 3V3NTUALY ROLS IN2 A POPAYAS FREID CHIKEN IN SAY MISISIPI1!111!!1 OMG LOL

OUR GOVARNM3NT MUST HAEV DA VERY BST INFORMATION POSIBLE AND W3 WIL USE IT 2 MAEK SURA TEH RIGHT PEOPL3 R IN DA RIGHT PLAECS 2 PROTECT OUR GOP-VOTNG W3ALTH GANARATNG CITIEZNS111!1111 WTF LOL OUR WAR AGANEST TAROR IS A CONT3ST OF WIL IN WHICH P3RS3V3RANCA IS POWER!!1!1!1 OMG WTF LOL IN DA RUINS OF TWO 2W3RS AT TEH WESTERN WAL OF TEH P3NTAGON ON A FEILD IN PENSYLVANIA THIS ADMINISTRATION MAED A PL3DG3 2 SHOW NO SHME IN BUILDNG ITS POLITICAL PLATFORMS OV3R DA GRAEVYARDS OF TEH INOC3NT VICTIMS OF SHORT-SIGHT3D FOR3IGN POLICEIS AND OUT-OF-CONTROL IENFECTIEV COVART OP3RATIONS BLOWBAK1111 LOL WUT DA DURATION OF THIS STRUGLE AND WUT DA DIFICULTEIS WE WIL NOT PERMIT TEH TRIUMPH OF VIOLENCA IN DA AFARES OF M3N FRE P3OPLE WIL SET TEH COURSE OF HIS2RY!1111! OMG WTF LOL AND LAT ME R3IETRAET BY FRE PAOPLA I M3AN THOSE WHO PUT THERE OWN SALFISH NAROW-MINDED IEDOLOGEIS AEHAD OF HUMAN D3CENCY THOSE PEOPLE WHOS3 MONEY AND LOVE OF MON3Y IS A FORTIFICATION AGANEST A WORLD OF POV3RTY THEY H3LP3D 2 CRAAET THOS3 PAOPLE WHO TOK R3GULARLY 2 BURNNG BUSHES THESA FRE PEOPLA SHAL S3T DA COURS311!11!1! OMG FOR TEH CORUPT AND INBRAD SHAL INHERIT TEH SCORCHED AARTH111!11 (APLAUS3)!!1!111 OMG LOL

2DAY TEH GRAEVST DANGER IN DA WAR ON T3ROR TEH GRAEVST DANG3R FACNG MERICA AND TEH WORLD IS OUTLAW REGIEMS TAHT SEK AND POSAS NUK3YULAR CH3MICAL AND BIOLOGICAL WEAPONS!1!1! OMG WTF LOL THIS THREAT IS NEW MARICAS DUTY IS FMILIAR!1!!!11! WTF LOL 2 TAEK IT IN DA AS FROM DA GUTLAS 3URO-FAGOTS WHO WIL IN A HEARTBAT GIEV MARICA A SECURITY BOTY CAL TEH S3COND THEYRE STINKY CHESA AND FUNY-TASTNG BER GATS THREAETNAD 2 COME OVER AND US3 OUR BIG THROBNG MISIELS 2 TAEK DOWN SAY A GOFY GENOCIED-DABLNG EUROP3AN DICTA2R!!1111 OMG AND IMM NOT TOKNG ABOUT HITLER11!!! LOL

WA LOVA BALENG THOSA LADEIS OUT AND TH3N GETNG AL HIGH ON OUR NOBLE AS-KIKNG FARTS1!!1!1! OMG

BUT MAEK NO MISTAEK DA FRENCH R JUST G3RMANS WHO MAEK SAUCES AND DA GERMANS R JUST FRENCH WHO MILITANTLY 3XTERNALIEZ THERE HATR3D OF S3MITIC RAECS!1!1! NEITH3R OF TH3SE THNGS R AL BAD!!!1111 OMG WTF MANELY DA GERMANS AND TEH FR3NCH SHUD JUST SHUT TEH FUK UP AND B RULED111! WTF

THROUGHOUT TEH 20TH CENTURY SMAL GROUPS OF MEN S3IEZD CONTROL OF GREAT NATIONS BUILT ARMEIS AND ARSENALS AND S3T OUT 2 DOMINAET TEH WEAK AND INTIMIDAET TEH WORLD!!1!111 OMG WTF LOL SORTA LIEK M3 BUT IMM A GOD GUY!!!1!!!! OMG WTF LOL SO R U!1!1 OMG WTF WEL NOT SO MUCH TEH MINORITY PARTY!11!1!!! OMG (APLAUS3)1!!!1! WTF LOL

IN EACH CAES THEYRE MBITIONS OF CRUELTY AND MURDER HAD NO LIMIT!!11!111 WTF LOL IN EACH CAES DA MBITIONS OF HITL3RISM MILITARISM COMUNISM CLIN2NISM HIPYISM FRE-LUNCH-FOR-TRASHISM AND AGANEST-USISM W3RA DEFEAETD BY TEH WIL OF FRE PEOPLES BY TEH STR3NGTH OF GR3AT ALIANCES AND BY TEH MIGHT OF DA UNIETD STAETS OF M3RICA!!!11 OMG WTF LOL (APLAUS3)11!1!!!1 OMG WTF

NOW IN THIS CANTURY TEH IEDOLOGY OF POW3R AND DOMINATION HAS AP3AERD AGANE AND SEKS 2 GANE DA ULTIMAET WEAPONS OF TAROR.1!11!!111!1!!111!1!1 OMG SECOND 2 DA SWET POLITICAL MACHINATIONS OF KARL AND KAERN OF COURS3111!!!

MERICA IS MAKNG A BROAD AND D3T3RMIEND 3FORT 2 CONFRONT TH3SE DANG3RS!!!! WUT ACTION IS REQUIERD WHEN3VER ACTION IS N3C3SARY I WIL DEF3ND TEH FREDOM AND SECURITY OF DA M3RICAN PLU2CRACY VIGOROUSLY RIMNG THEYRE PRIVIELG3D AND PARFECTLY CL3ANSED ANUS3S WIT MAH POINTY AND MUSCULAR 2NGUE BFORE ASKNG THAM WUT 2 DO NAXT11!1111! WTF LOL DIF3R3NT THREATS R3QUIER DIFERANT STRAETGEIS1!!1 OMG IN IRAN WA CONTINUE 2 SE A GOV3RNM3NT TAHT RAPRESES ITS PEOPLE PURSUAS W3APONS OF MAS D3STRUCTION AND SUPORTS TEROR!!11 OMG WTF LOL

WA ALSO SE IRANIAN CITIEZNS SPEAKNG OUT FOR LIEBRTY AND HUMAN RIGHTS AND D3MOCRACY AND TACHNO MUSIC!11!!!! IRANIANS LIEK AL P3OPLE HAEV A RIGHT 2 CHOSE THEYRE OWN GOVARNMENT AND DETERMIEN THERE OWN D3STINY AND TEH UNIETD STAETS SUPORTS THEYRE ASPIRATIONS 2 LIEV AS A FUTURE MERICAN COLONY!!111!1 OMG LOL

ON DA KOREAN PENINSULA AN OPRESIEV REGIEM RULES A P3OPLA LIVNG IN FEAR AND STARVATION!1!1111 THROUGHOUT TEH 190S DA UNIETD STAETS R3LEID ON A NEGOTIAETD FRMAWORK 2 KEP NORTH KOREA FROM GANENG NUK3YULAR WEAPONS1!11 OMG WTF W3 KIND OF FORGOT ABOUT TAHT!111 WTF LOL U KNOW HOW CRANKY THOSE GOKS CAN B1!!1! OMG WTF LOL BUT LETS B R3AL HERA U CANT DRIEV AN SUV ON SPICY CABAEG U KNOW WUT I MEAN???!??!!! OMG WTF

TWELV3 Y3ARS AGO SADM HUS3IN FAECD DA PROSP3CT OF BNG DA LAST CASUALTY IN A WAR HE HAD STARTAD AND LOST1!!!! OMG LOL 2 R HIMSALF HE AGRED 2 DISARM OF AL WAAPONS OF MAS DASTRUCTION111!!11 OMG FOR TEH NAXT 12 YEARS H3 SYSTAMATICALY VIOLAETD TAHT AGREM3NT1!!1 OMG H3 PURSU3D CHAMICAL BIOLOGICAL AND NUKEYULAR W3APONS EVEN WHIEL INSPAC2RS WARE IN HIS COUNTRY1!!1! OMG WTF LOL HE IS NOW A MAGA-THR3AT 2 DA HUNDR3DS OF MIELS OF LIEFLES D3S3RT TAHT SUROUND HIS PATHATIC STRONGHOLDS TAHT R MONI2R3D BY A COALITION ARMADA111!11 WTF

NOTHNG 2 DAET HAS R3STRANE3D HIM FROM HIS N3FARIOUS UND3RTAKNGS NOT 3CONOMIC SANCTIONS NOT ISOLATION FROM DA CIVILIEZD WORLD NOT EVEN CRUIES MISIEL STRIEKS ON HIS MILITARY FACILITEIS11!1!! OMG WTF LOL HEL- NOT EVAN JUICY OIL D3ALS WIT TEH FROGS AND TEH RUSIANS11!11 DA BRITISH GOVARNMANT HAS LAARNED TAHT SADM HUS3IN RACANTLY SOUGHT SIGNIFICANT QUANTITEIS OF URANIUM FROM AFRICA!1!!1 LOL OUR INTELIEGNC3 SOURCES TEL US TAHT HE HAS AT3MPTAD 2 PURCHAES HIGH-STRENGTH ALUMINUM TUBS SUITABL3 FOR NUCL3AR WEAPONS PRODUCTION11111 HE IS ALSO PURSUNG DA D3V3LOPMENT OF A SAETLIET LAESR CANON 2 BLOW UP TEH MON TRYNG 2 BUILD A MARAUDNG AREBORNA HORD3 OF CANIBAL ROBOT OC2PI AND USNG ILAGALY PIRAETD TIVO!!!1111 (GASPS)!!11!!! OMG WTF LOL

SADM HUS3IN HAS NOT CRADIBLY 3XPLANEED THESE ACTIVITEIS1!!!1!1 OMG WTF LOL HA CL3ARLY HAS MUCH 2 HIED11111 WTF LOL LIEK MAH HIS2RY WIT COCANE3 AND TEXAS WHORES ONLY SEDEIR1!!1 TEH DICTA2R OF IRAQ IS NOT DISARMNG!!!11 LOL 2 TEH CONTRARY HA IS D3CEIVNG!!11 WTF LOL Y3AR AFTER Y3AR SADM HUSEIN HAS GONE 2 ELABORAET LANGTHS SPENT ANORMOUS SUMS TAEKN GR3AT RISKS 2 BUILD AND KEP W3APONS OF MAS DASTRUCTION1!1!111 OMG WTF BUT Y?!!?!??! OMG WTF TEH ONLY POSIBLA EXPLANATION TEH ONLY POSIBLE US3 HA CUD HAEV FOR THOS3 WEAPONS IS 2 DOMINAET INTIMIDAET OR ATAK!!1!!11 OMG JUST LIEK H3S BEN DONG FOR 12 Y3ARS11111! OMG WTF LOL DOMINATNG INTIMIDATNG AND ATAKNG.1!!1!!!1!1111! OMG LOL AL FROM DA SAEFTY OF HIS LITLE SHITY-HOBLED CMAL AS OF A QUASI-COUNTRY11!!!111 WTF LOL W3 KNOW FOR A FACT HE HAS TEH CAPACITY 2 NUK3 HALF OF BAGHDAD1!!!1!! WTF (APLAUSE)1111!11 OMG

IRAQI REFUGES TEL US HOW FORC3D CONFESIONS R OBTANEAD BY 2RTURNG CHILDR3N WHIEL THEYRE PAERNTS R MAED 2 WATCH1!!11 OMG LOL INTERNATIONAL HUMAN RIGHTS GROUPS HAEV CATALOGUAD OTHER M3THODS USED IN TEH 2RTURA CHMBRS OF IRAQ ALECTRIC SHOK BURNNG WIT HOT IRONS DRIPNG ACID ON TEH SKIN MUTILATION WIT 3LECTRIC DRILS CUTNG OUT 2NGU3S AND RAEP!!!!!! WTF LOL ALSO FEDNG GRANDMOTHERS 2 PITS OF CROCODIELS PUSHNG TABASCO SAUCE-SOAEKD BMBO UNDER FNGERNALES AND RUNNG UNCUT FNG3RNALES DOWN CHOKBOARDS!111!1 WTF LOL WANT MOR3 PROF OF WUT A MONSTROUS BAST-MONST3R SADM IS?????!?!? OMG WTF HA FORCES HIS OWN DOPELGANGERS 2 ORALY GRATIFY HIM1!!!!111 OMG LOL TH3S3 R TEH SORT OF THNGS TAHT MAEK SENSITIEV SOFT MIDLE-CLAS PACIFISTS AT MNESTY INTARNATIONAL CRY111111! W3L TAHT AND TEH HOURS AND EVERYTHNG MAH SAYS1!!1!11 BUT 2 THOS3 WUSEIS WHAN IT COMES 2 2RTURE OR TEH UNIL8RALIST AROGANC3 OF MERICA WUT TEH FUK TAHT MEANS) - WAL DRIL AWAY SADM1111!1! OMG WTF LOL

IF THIS IS NOT 3VIL THEN EVIL HAS NO MAANNG!1!1 OMG WTF LOL THIS IS SUPER EVIL!!!1! OMG WTF ITS LIEK HITLAR X 2 3VIL111!1!! OMG ALSO 2 AL U P3TA AND ANIMAL D3FENS3 KIDS OUT THEIR!1111!1!!!!111111!111!1 OMG WTF LOL RAM3MBR TAHT SADM HAS TEH CAPACITY 2 GAS PUPY DOGS!!!!!!1 LOL AND 2NIGHT I HAEV A MESAEG FOR TEH BRAEV AND OPRESAD P3OPLA OF IRAQ UR MAH IS NOT SUROUNDNG UR COUNTRY UR MAH IS RULNG UR COUNTRY!1!1!1!! WTF LOL AND TEH DAY H3 AND HIS R3GIEM R RAMOVED FROM POWER WIL B DA DAY OF UR LIEBRATION AS A GLORIOUS RANE OF CONSUM3R CHOIECS RANES DOWN UPON U1!1!!111 OMG STARBUKS!11! WTF LOL TEH GAP!!111 WTF MCDONALDS!1!111! WTF (APLAUSA)11!11!1 OMG LOL TEH WORLD HAS WATE3D 12 YEARS FOR IRAQ 2 DISARM!!!! OMG WTF LOL M3RICA WIL NOT ACEPT A S3RIOUS AND MOUNTNG THRAAT 2 OUR COUNTRY AND OUR FREINDS AND OUR ALEIS!!11!!1! 2 THOSE WHO DOUBT A CONECTION BTWEN DA R3LIGIOUSLY FANATICAL AL QAADA AND TEH SACULAR HARD-DRINKNG DICTA2RSHIP OF SADM - W3 HAEV DISCOVERED TAHT SADM WAS ON AL QAEDAS RMADAN GRETNG CARD LIST111!111 OMG LOL

W3 WIL CONSULT BUT LET THEYRE B NO MISUNDERSTANDNG IF SADM HUSEIN DOES NOT FULY DISARM FOR DA SAEFTY OF OUR PEOPLA AND FOR TEH P3AEC OF TEH WORLD WE WIL LAAD A COALITION OF UNWILNG SMAL DEFENSAL3S GULF COAST AND ISLAND NATIONS 2 MAEK SADM SORY HE AVER TREID 2 WHAK MAH POPA!!!11 LOL 2NIGHT I HAEV A MASAEG FOR DA MEN AND WOM3N WHO WIL KEP DA P3AEC MEMBRS OF DA MARICAN ARMED FORCES U R MAH FAVORIET POL-INCR3ASNG 2LS1!11!1 OMG WTF ALTHOUGH I SPANT VEITNM SERVNG CUSHY DOMESTIC DUTY U SORY LOW3R-CLAS GRUNTS HAD 2 CLIMB DA LAD3R OF SUCAS WIT UR HANDS FUL OF UR UNLUKY BUDEIS GUTS!!!!11 WTF LOL DA IRONY TAHT A COWARD SUCH AS MYS3LF CUD ORDAR UR D3ATHS WHOLASAEL ON AN UN3CESARY OFANSIEV WAR TAHT WIL MAEK MAH VIEC PRESIEDNTS BUDEIS RICHAR AND 3NSURE ME A SACOND CIVIL RIGHTS-RAPNG TARM IS STAG3RNG11!11! OMG WTF NOW IMM NOT IRONICAL BUT ITS LIEK MAH WIEF TEH CH3F SAYS U CANT MAEK A OMALET WITHOUT BR3AKNG SOME EGS!111 LOL LOTS AND LOTS OF EGS!11!1! WTF BUT MAN ITS GONA B A GOD OM3L3T A BIG ONA 2!1111!! OMG LOL BIG ENOUGH 2 FIL A HUGE TROUGH FROM WHICH MAH COUNTLES POLICY-INFLUENCNG CMPAGEN CONTRIBU2RS CAN GORGE THEMSELVES SIK!11!1 WTF LOL (APLAUSE)11!1 LOL

IF WAR IS FORCED UPON US OR IF I FORC3 WAR UPON US WE WIL FIGHT IN A JUST CAUSE AND BY JUST MEANS SPARNG IN EV3RY WAY WE CAN TEH INOCANT!1!!!1 OMG MOR3 OR LES!!1!!!1! OMG WTF LOL AND WA GO FORWARD WIT CONFIEDNCA B/C THIS CAL OF HIS2RY HAS COME 2 TEH RIGHT COUNTRY1!1111 OMG M3RICANS R A RESOLUT3 PAOPL3 WHO HAEV RIESN 2 EV3RY T3ST OF OUR TIEM11!!111 ADV3RSITY HAS REVEAELD TEH CHARACT3R OF OUR COUNTRY 2 TEH WORLD AND 2 OURSELVES11!! WTF LOL DIS3NSION HAS REVEAELD THIS COUNTRY HAS A LONG WAY 2 GO BFORA WE R SPIRITUALY AND RACIALY PURE!1!1 WTF LOL (APLAUS3)11!11!11 OMG WTF

M3RICANS R A FRE P3OPLE WHO KNOW TAHT FREDOM IS DA RIGHT OF 3VARY AT3NDE OF DA ANUAL DAVOS CONVENTION AND 3VERY DISTRUSTNG LAND-LOKAD GOD-F3ARNG BIBLE-THUMPNG TWO-FAECD GLUTON WHO IS PERFECTLY HAPY 2 B LUL3D IN2 A ZOMBEI-LIEK TRANCE BY DA AFOREM3NTIONED MONAY BAGS AND OF AVARY NATION SMART ANOUGH 2 BLY UP 2 TEH MERICAN FED BAG AND R3TURN 2 THEYRE USA-BUILT STALS 2 SHIT IN THERE OWN PARSONAL PIELS OF HAY!!!!!11 OMG

WE MERICANS HAEV FATEH IN OURSALVES BUT NOT IN OURSELVES ALONA!!11!1 OMG LOL W3 DO NOT CLAME 2 KNOW AL DA WAYS OF PROVIEDNCA Y3T WE CAN TRUST IN TH3M PLACNG OUR CONFIEDNC3 IN DA LOVNG GOD BHIND AL OF LIEF AND AL OF HIS2RY!!11! B/C OUR LOVNG GOD LOVES 2 KIK AS.!!!11!11!1!!!!!!1 OMG ESPECIALY DA AS OF FALSA GODS LIEK ALAH!1111!! OUR GOD ALSO PITEIS TEH ATHAISTS WHO INSIST ON SAPARATION OF CHURCH AND STAET!1!!1!11 WTF LOL FORGIEV THEM FATHAR FOR TH3Y DO NOT KNOW TAHT IN HAL AV3N UR TETH BURN11!!1 LOL (APLAUSE)11!!!1!1 OMG WTF

MAY H3 GUIED US NOW MAY HA TOK 2 MAH CHRISTIAN CONSTITUENCY AND IN TURN MAY TH3Y TRANSLAET 2 ME WUT HE SADE 2 THEM AND MAY GOD CONTINU3 2 BL3S DA MORAL MAJORITY OF DA UNIETD STAETS OF M3RICA SO TAHT WE CONTINUE 2 B 3ARTHS #1 WINARS1!!! OMG WTF LOL (APLAUS3)1!1!1 OMG LOL

THANK U1!!!1!!1 WTF LOL

Forthe · Post by **Forthe** » February 6, 2003, 1:42 am

New entry for my stfu list.

Arborealus · Post by **Arborealus** » February 6, 2003, 1:52 am

rofl blum...

Masekle · Post by **Masekle** » February 6, 2003, 5:53 am

Aranuil wrote:If I'm removing a girls pants/skirt, and I see a picture of George Bush on her thong, I'm out of there.

If you stop to look for advertisments. Something is amiss.

If you get that far you should thank the stars and turn out the lights.