Andy Rooney quote.

[Searyx]

Stupid people should have to wear signs that just say, "I'm Stupid."

That way you wouldn't rely on them, would you? You wouldn't ask them anything.

It would be like, "Excuse me...oops...never mind, didn't see your sign."


It's like before my wife and I moved. Our house was full of boxes and there was a U-Haul truck in our driveway. My neighbor comes over and says, "Hey, you moving?" "Nope. We just pack our stuff up once or twice a week to see how many boxes it takes. Here's your sign."


A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we pulled his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big ol' stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch all them fish?" "Nope. Talked 'em into giving up. Here's your sign."


I was watching one of those animal shows on the Discovery Channel. There was a guy inventing a shark bite suit. And there's only one way to test it. "Alright, Jimmy, you got that shark suit on, it looks good...They want you to jump into this pool of sharks, and you tell us if it hurts when they bite you." "Well, all right, but hold my sign. I don't wanna lose it."


Last time I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of those
side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks out, looks at my truck, looks at me, and I SWEAR he said, "Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist. I said, "Nope. I was driving around and those other three just swelled right up on me. Here's your sign."

We were trying to sell our car about a year ago. A guy came over to the house and drove the car around for about 45 minutes. We get back to the house, he gets out of the car, reaches down and grabs the exhaust pipe, then says, "Darn that's hot!" See, if he'd been wearing his sign, I could have
stopped him.

I learned to drive an 18-wheeler in my days of adventure. Wouldn't you know, I misjudged the height of a bridge. The truck got stuck and I couldn't get it out, no matter how I tried. I radioed in for help and eventually a local cop shows up to take the report. He went through his basic questioning ... okay...no problem. I thought for sure he was clear of needing a sign...until he asked, "So, is your truck
stuck?" I couldn't help myself! I looked at him, looked back at the rig and then back to him and said, "No, I'm delivering a bridge... here's your sign."

I stayed late at work one night and a co-worker looked at me and said, "Are you still here?" I replied, "No. I left about 10 minutes ago. Here's your sign."

Know anybody who needs a sign?

[Sinzar]

that was funny

especially the last one

[Millie]

Know anybody who needs a sign?

Yes. Howabout the person who posted this?

Oh, and I need one for myself -- for momentarily taking Searyx off ignore.

[Lynks]

That wasn't made by Andy Rooney dumbass. It was from some comedian, or some singer. I can't remeber which one, but 100% sure its not Andy Rooney....dumbass

STFU Searyx

[Mekil Jueaze]

I'm not sure if he originally came up with it, but I know that Rodney Carrington pretty much says this line for line in his stand up act, wrote a song for it too.

[Phugg_Innay]

/agree Millie , I never thought I would say that. Same boat I took fucknut off ignore to read that too

[masteen]

The real source of those quotes is a redneck comedian by the name of Bill Engvall.

Searyx once again makes me appreciate the STFU feature.

[Owenn]

Yah, I was thinking that too, masteen. Engvall is from Georgetown, TX about 30 minutes from where I live in Austin. He did a country song with Travis Tritt called "Show me your sign" or something like that. It prolly had a couple of those quotes in it, too!

[Misi]

Mad Magazine beat them all with their smart things to say to stupid people...first time i saw one was either a late 60's or early 70's edition. =)

[Ramseis]

Actually it was Jeff Foxworty who said it has a whole song and everything