Scam Alert! Don't be duped!

Winnow · Post by **Winnow** » January 17, 2005, 8:08 pm

This shit is bogus:

Lynks · Post by **Lynks** » January 17, 2005, 8:21 pm

Should I ask for my money back?

Tenuvil · Post by **Tenuvil** » January 17, 2005, 8:26 pm

Winnow, please post "The Insult That Made A Man Of Mac", best comic book ad evar!

Aslanna · Post by **Aslanna** » January 17, 2005, 8:37 pm

I'd be more interested in seeing the magnificent fully-illustrated Manual of Sea-Monkey Care, Raising, Training and Breeding.

Diae Soulmender · Post by **Diae Soulmender** » January 17, 2005, 8:52 pm

I have Sea Monkeys in my crusty musky sock!

Soreali · Post by **Soreali** » January 17, 2005, 9:40 pm

if you put seaman in with sea monkeys will they create a statue of you?

Winnow · Post by **Winnow** » January 17, 2005, 9:49 pm

"Own a bowlfull of happiness"

That sounds more like a Warp Core to me!

•Sea-monkey anatomy. Did you know sea-monkeys breathe through their legs? They're also born with a third eye, which they lose as adults. And, as Susan once explained to me, they have "strong chitinous exoskeletons that will protect them from harm." I'm so jealous.

•Sea-monkey digestion. Every five days, I feed my monkeys a tiny spoonful of food (which came with the eggs). You can tell when sea-monkeys are full because they'll have a green or brown stripe going down the center of their bodies. They also feed off algae, so it's a good idea never to clean the tank.

•Sea-monkey love. Sea-monkeys reproduce sexually and asexually — how convenient is that? When they do mate with another monkey, it can last days at a time. (This scared the life out of me when I first saw it.) Birth is even more horrifying, and looks like, as Susan puts it, "a death throe."

•Sea-monkey disease. When my monkeys were only three weeks old, tiny black dots began to appear in the tank. I e-mailed Susan, who quickly confirmed it was a form of very dangerous and rare bacteria. Through Susan's tight sea-monkey connections, I received a packet of "Sea Medic" within days. Thank goodness they all survived.

•Sea-monkey death. "I had one tank going for about 26 months, and then … well, I'm still moving towards the acceptance phase for that tank, so I better not talk about it," Susan wrote to me, during one of our many sea-monkey heart-to-hearts. I realize I'm going to lose many more sea monkeys in the months (and years) ahead, so I'm trying to enjoy them while they're still here. This, I believe, is the greatest sea-monkey lesson of all.

So now it's been more than four months since I first dropped the eggs into the sea-monkey tank, and I still haven't tired of watching them swim.

Some of my friends make fun of me for such loyalty, but why should I be ashamed? Sea-monkeys have held a place in pop culture for more than 40 years.

Brooke Shields is a longtime sea-monkey fan, you know. Liz Phair and the Pixies have sung about them. They've surfaced on The Simpsons, King of Queens and South Park. Back in 1992, CBS even aired a sitcom called The Amazing Live Sea-Monkeys (too bad it didn't last a season).

To some people, they may just be shrimp, but to me, sea-monkeys are an innocent, enlightening gift. Before raising them I had no idea what the Beatles meant when they sang, "Everybody's got something to hide except me and my monkey."

Laliana · Post by **Laliana** » January 17, 2005, 10:07 pm

This post brought back painful memories of my childhood. Thanks Winnow.

Taly · Post by **Taly** » January 18, 2005, 10:53 am

LOL I had these for a school project in i think elementary. They are actually called Brine Shrimp or something like that.

Lor · Post by **Lor** » January 18, 2005, 11:32 am

Yep they are Brine shrimp, the Fish love eating them little bastards.

Winnow · Post by **Winnow** » January 18, 2005, 1:05 pm

!=

Is that a Sea Monkey or a fish turd the Aquanaut is greeting?