Can't find your cat?
Moderator: TheMachine
- Aabidano
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- Location: Florida
Can't find your cat?
"Life is what happens while you're making plans for later."
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- Star Farmer
- Posts: 386
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"Kill a Kitten"
By Stephen Lynch
When the game of like makes you feel like quittin'
it helps a lot if you kill a kitten.
Mark my words 'cause from where I'm sittin'
you can't go wrong if you kill a kitten.
There's no crime that you'd be committin.'
I know the law -- you can kill a kitten.
And if you need yarn for that scarf you're knittin'
you'll get plenty when you kill a kitten.
Feed it turpentine or break its spine.
Crush it with your shoe as long as you kill a kitten.
If the one you love isn't quite as smitten,
she'll like you better if you kill a kitten.
And I'll quote the bible 'cause that's where it's written,
if ye loveth Jesus ye must kill a kitten.
Flush it down the can.
Hit it with your van.
Drown it in a lake.
Bake a kitty cake.
Throw it at a train.
Make it snort cocaine.
Stick some TNT up its cat booty.
Do what you must do as long as you
kill a kitten.
Killing kittens isn't easy
and if the thought makes you feel queasy
grab a pitchfork from the shed
and kill a puppy dog instead.
Kill a kitten.
Kill a kitten,
a little furry kitten.
By Stephen Lynch
When the game of like makes you feel like quittin'
it helps a lot if you kill a kitten.
Mark my words 'cause from where I'm sittin'
you can't go wrong if you kill a kitten.
There's no crime that you'd be committin.'
I know the law -- you can kill a kitten.
And if you need yarn for that scarf you're knittin'
you'll get plenty when you kill a kitten.
Feed it turpentine or break its spine.
Crush it with your shoe as long as you kill a kitten.
If the one you love isn't quite as smitten,
she'll like you better if you kill a kitten.
And I'll quote the bible 'cause that's where it's written,
if ye loveth Jesus ye must kill a kitten.
Flush it down the can.
Hit it with your van.
Drown it in a lake.
Bake a kitty cake.
Throw it at a train.
Make it snort cocaine.
Stick some TNT up its cat booty.
Do what you must do as long as you
kill a kitten.
Killing kittens isn't easy
and if the thought makes you feel queasy
grab a pitchfork from the shed
and kill a puppy dog instead.
Kill a kitten.
Kill a kitten,
a little furry kitten.
- Xouqoa
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I really never understood the whole "omg I h8 cats" .. or "I love cats.. they taste good" thing... why are cats hated by some people so much? I've never heard anyone say they want to flush a dog down the toilet or feed it turpentine. Where does this hatred for small furry creatures stem from?
"Our problems are man-made, therefore they may be solved by man. No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings." - John F Kennedy
I love cats: what other animal shows its loyalty/love to a person by killing something and bringing to you? I think a lot of people prefer dogs because the whole instant gratification: most dogs love people, love attention any time, any place. Cats are more independent and more variable in their responses to people: if you get a "people cat" its almost like a dog, while something like my cat comes to you when she wants and expects you to gtfa from her the rest of the time.
Wulfran Moondancer
Stupid Sidekick of the Lambent Dorf
Petitioner to Club Bok Bok
Founding Member of the Barbarian Nation Movement
Stupid Sidekick of the Lambent Dorf
Petitioner to Club Bok Bok
Founding Member of the Barbarian Nation Movement
- miir
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My cat follows me around from the moment I get in the door until I fall asleep. He always keeps me in visual range.Wulfran wrote:I love cats: what other animal shows its loyalty/love to a person by killing something and bringing to you? I think a lot of people prefer dogs because the whole instant gratification: most dogs love people, love attention any time, any place. Cats are more independent and more variable in their responses to people: if you get a "people cat" its almost like a dog, while something like my cat comes to you when she wants and expects you to gtfa from her the rest of the time.
He sleeps at the foot of the bed, he follows me to the bathroom and waits outside of the shower.
He's constantly head butting me and rubbing his fur all over me.
Basically, he's a littler trained dog that I don't have to take out for a walk.
I've got 99 problems and I'm not dealing with any of them - Lay-Z
- Lalanae
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I think it comes from having a bad experience with a mean cat when one was little. There are some grouchy cats out there, but often its just a cat thats tired of being pestered by some kid chasing it around and grabbing its tail. Same thing with dogs too. I've know a lot of people who don't care for big dogs because they are afraid.Xouqoa wrote:I really never understood the whole "omg I h8 cats" .. or "I love cats.. they taste good" thing... why are cats hated by some people so much? I've never heard anyone say they want to flush a dog down the toilet or feed it turpentine. Where does this hatred for small furry creatures stem from?
I like em all

Lalanae
Burundi High Chancellor for Tourism, Sodomy and Pie
Unofficial Canadian, Forbidden Lover of Pie, Jesus-Hatin'' Sodomite, President of KFC (Kyoukan Fan Club), hawt, perververted, intellectual submissive with E.S.P (Extra Sexual Persuasion)
Burundi High Chancellor for Tourism, Sodomy and Pie
Unofficial Canadian, Forbidden Lover of Pie, Jesus-Hatin'' Sodomite, President of KFC (Kyoukan Fan Club), hawt, perververted, intellectual submissive with E.S.P (Extra Sexual Persuasion)
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- Vetiria
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My cat's a mean little fucker. He's 14 years-old and will still take a big chunk out of your arm. I wish he had shorter hair though.
I used to have 2 cats, but when we moved about a year and a half ago, he never got used to the environment of the new house. He got sick, stopped eating, and eventually passed away. That's the worst part about having pets. It's like losing a family member.
I used to have 2 cats, but when we moved about a year and a half ago, he never got used to the environment of the new house. He got sick, stopped eating, and eventually passed away. That's the worst part about having pets. It's like losing a family member.
- Xouqoa
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My cat is very personable to me... but she doesn't really like other people too much. She's gotten a little better with roomies, but is still pretty fickled when it comes to them even. She acts like a dog to me though, usually.


"Our problems are man-made, therefore they may be solved by man. No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings." - John F Kennedy
- Lalanae
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I dated a guy who had an adorable young cat (just out of the kitten stage) who hated everyone but him. We were watching a movie, sitting on his bed, and he put his arm behind me (kinda around my waist). The cat had been sitting behind us and when he did that she started swatting his arm until he moved it away from me. It was hilarious.
Lalanae
Burundi High Chancellor for Tourism, Sodomy and Pie
Unofficial Canadian, Forbidden Lover of Pie, Jesus-Hatin'' Sodomite, President of KFC (Kyoukan Fan Club), hawt, perververted, intellectual submissive with E.S.P (Extra Sexual Persuasion)
Burundi High Chancellor for Tourism, Sodomy and Pie
Unofficial Canadian, Forbidden Lover of Pie, Jesus-Hatin'' Sodomite, President of KFC (Kyoukan Fan Club), hawt, perververted, intellectual submissive with E.S.P (Extra Sexual Persuasion)
- masteen
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I dislike "house" pets of all kinds. I dislike my sister's miniature collie as much as my friend's obese house cats. They are all equally useless.
Now my friend has a dog that I just love, because she can track deer, flush game brids, and even do some light retreival duties. That is an animal worth feeding.
Now my friend has a dog that I just love, because she can track deer, flush game brids, and even do some light retreival duties. That is an animal worth feeding.
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Color coded by sex, I didn't name them...my little sister and brother did age 10 and 15 (I'm 28 fyi). Snipes is short for "Wesley Snipes" because she is black and crazy, problem was she was a she and so I didn't like to call her by a guys name.
My cats are friendly, so far I have only had 2 cat haters over and both of them actually got down and started playing with them when I left the room, they said my cats are the only ones they ever liked.
Yes, that's my bedroom, and normally where you will find them if I'm not home. If I'm home they follow me from room to room.
They were kittens a stray cat had in my step-grandma's garage. They never try and go outside, but snipes does have a people food fetish so you can't leave the room if you have food out, but she won't attack your plate in front of you she will wait until your out of sight.
-retired-
since i grew up with 4+ cats my entire life, cats > dogs in my opinion.
One of my cats right now is cross eyed so whenever you try and play with him he starts freaking out and over/underestimating jumps and where you are so he always jumps too far or not far enough or same when he swats at ya. Great Fun. I have 4 cats now and a yorky, good combo of pets heh.
One of my cats right now is cross eyed so whenever you try and play with him he starts freaking out and over/underestimating jumps and where you are so he always jumps too far or not far enough or same when he swats at ya. Great Fun. I have 4 cats now and a yorky, good combo of pets heh.
Justin
Draaxx/Tombe
Draaxx/Tombe
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- Lalanae
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Over 30 posts on a cat thread and not a single Sylvos sighting?
Lalanae
Burundi High Chancellor for Tourism, Sodomy and Pie
Unofficial Canadian, Forbidden Lover of Pie, Jesus-Hatin'' Sodomite, President of KFC (Kyoukan Fan Club), hawt, perververted, intellectual submissive with E.S.P (Extra Sexual Persuasion)
Burundi High Chancellor for Tourism, Sodomy and Pie
Unofficial Canadian, Forbidden Lover of Pie, Jesus-Hatin'' Sodomite, President of KFC (Kyoukan Fan Club), hawt, perververted, intellectual submissive with E.S.P (Extra Sexual Persuasion)
- Drolgin Steingrinder
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I like almost all cats. The only ones I dislike are the ones that no longer look like an animal but like some fluffy thing Zsa Zsa Gabor would wear in cold weather.
As for dogs...little runt dogs that yip and whine rather than bark need to die. All of them. Oh, and the feral dogs that remind you that all canines are, in fact, just one evolutionary step away from being a wolf (usually the ones running around unleashed with the owner frantically shouting "It's alright, he won't bite, just don't show him fear!") can scare the hell out of me...
As for dogs...little runt dogs that yip and whine rather than bark need to die. All of them. Oh, and the feral dogs that remind you that all canines are, in fact, just one evolutionary step away from being a wolf (usually the ones running around unleashed with the owner frantically shouting "It's alright, he won't bite, just don't show him fear!") can scare the hell out of me...
IT'S HARD TO PUT YOUR FINGER ON IT; SOMETHING IS WRONG
I'M LIKE THE UNCLE WHO HUGGED YOU A LITTLE TOO LONG
I'M LIKE THE UNCLE WHO HUGGED YOU A LITTLE TOO LONG
my kitties. Drakk and Morrie


and yes, i am fingering his bum


and yes, i am fingering his bum
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- Keverian FireCry
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Adela already posted his IRL pic on the appropriate thread.
However this phrase caught my attention:
However this phrase caught my attention:
If I remember Millie kept protesting she was an IRL female hottie. Of course she might still be...but that would be another story, and possibly a web cam.Now if only they could invent the device that helps you lose a cat. Life with my girlfriend would be so much easier.
-retired-