Serious Question

Chidoro · Post by **Chidoro** » July 15, 2005, 8:19 pm

Is there a national mandate I'm unaware of that states something to the effect of:
1. Any individual who fails their driver's exam at least once must stick a jesus fish on their trunk

or

2. Any individual who:
a. generally fails to comprehend the rules of the road on a regular basis
b. regularly is at fault for unnecessary traffic congestion due to consistent poor decision making behind the wheel
c. remains oblivious to traffic signals, traffic signs, and/or, traffic guidelines

get a jesus fish stapled to their trunk.

Now I watch. I live in a congested area. Managed to drive ~400k miles over 18+ years w/out being in a real accident (and the one which essentially caused little screw marks in my rear bumper is the only indication of any car on car contact). I really try to be understanding. But the god damn jesus fish fuckers can't seem to function a vehicle.

I must have missed the mandate

discuss

Aslanna · Post by **Aslanna** » July 15, 2005, 8:41 pm

I don't think this a really a serious question.

Jesus saves!

Kaelina · Post by **Kaelina** » July 15, 2005, 8:45 pm

I think the majority of drivers are stupid assholes, fish or no fish. If I were supreme overlord of the US, I'd make drivers take an IQ and depth perception test before issuing a license to drive anything but a fucking lawn mower. =p

These are much better alternatives to the retarded religious fish!
http://www.darwinfish.com/

Dregor Thule · Post by **Dregor Thule** » July 15, 2005, 8:46 pm

Who knew faith-based fuel systems didn't work!

Tenuvil · Post by **Tenuvil** » July 15, 2005, 9:06 pm

Chidoro wrote:Is there a national mandate I'm unaware of that states something to the effect of:
1. Any individual who fails their driver's exam at least once must stick a jesus fish on their trunk

or

2. Any individual who:
a. generally fails to comprehend the rules of the road on a regular basis
b. regularly is at fault for unnecessary traffic congestion due to consistent poor decision making behind the wheel
c. remains oblivious to traffic signals, traffic signs, and/or, traffic guidelines

get a jesus fish stapled to their trunk.

Now I watch. I live in a congested area. Managed to drive ~400k miles over 18+ years w/out being in a real accident (and the one which essentially caused little screw marks in my rear bumper is the only indication of any car on car contact). I really try to be understanding. But the god damn jesus fish fuckers can't seem to function a vehicle.

I must have missed the mandate

discuss

You are absolutely correct, Chid. As a corollary, any driver with a combination of Jesus fish and Texas A&M University stickers on their vehicle is twice as bad.

Winnow · Post by **Winnow** » July 15, 2005, 9:13 pm

Around the Phoenix Metro area, if you spot one of these on a bumper:

you can count on the same drivers Chidoro described.

Dregor Thule · Post by **Dregor Thule** » July 15, 2005, 9:21 pm

Tenuvil wrote:You are absolutely correct, Chid. As a corollary, any driver with a combination of Jesus fish and Texas A&M University stickers on their vehicle is twice as bad.

And they drive like shit too! ><

Tyek · Post by **Tyek** » July 16, 2005, 10:11 pm

Saw the drunkest driver I have ever seen Friday. No fish on his car, but the guy went off the road, almost down an embankment. He swerved back and almost took me out. I went around him fast. Next he slowly went up a second embankment. By this time I decide to call 911. As I start describing the situation to the dispatcher, he slowly crosses all 4 lanes and slams into the center divide. Luckily everyone could see he was drunk and had given him some space.

LOL that drunk at 7AM on a Friday? I am too old to pull off that kind of trick. Hope he was ok, but glad he did not hurt anyone else.

Niffoni · Post by **Niffoni** » July 17, 2005, 2:04 am

I think bad drivers are just hedging their bets for the afterlife, as they're probably well on their way.

Hayley · Post by **Hayley** » July 17, 2005, 2:39 am

I drive with a Texas A&M Former Student sticker on my car and I drive fine.... F you! (I don't, however, have the fish on my car)

Tenuvil · Post by **Tenuvil** » July 17, 2005, 4:39 am

Hayley wrote:(I don't, however, have the fish on my car)

see then it's all good

Sargeras · Post by **Sargeras** » July 17, 2005, 8:04 am

Hi Hayley

Dregor Thule · Post by **Dregor Thule** » July 17, 2005, 9:15 am

Hayley wrote:I drive with a Texas A&M Former Student sticker on my car and I drive fine.... F you! (I don't, however, have the fish on my car)

Omg hick!

Rivera Bladestrike · Post by **Rivera Bladestrike** » July 17, 2005, 9:10 pm

I want to know why there are 4 and 5 ribbons on every frickin car I see these days. Its ridiculous. I hate seeing these goddamn "support our troops" "support a cure" "support a big rubber dick in an ass"... I don't care what someone supports, and I certainly don't need to see it on the back of their goddamn car.

Aslanna · Post by **Aslanna** » July 17, 2005, 9:47 pm

Not to mention that the people those stickers support the most are the people making them.

Winnow · Post by **Winnow** » July 17, 2005, 11:08 pm

Aslanna wrote:Not to mention that the people those stickers support the most are the people making them.

And those people are in China.

Niffoni · Post by **Niffoni** » July 17, 2005, 11:10 pm

Thanks for supporting communism, you troops-loving assholes!

Canelek · Post by **Canelek** » July 18, 2005, 12:57 am

I am still stunned that people actually still believe that there is some kind of SUPREME BEING in a fictitional non-space(aka heaven) that reigns terror on the populace in the form of EVIL (Figure 1.(Supreme Being pics not available at this time.))

Figure 1.

Noysyrump · Post by **Noysyrump** » July 18, 2005, 6:40 pm

Fig. 2

http://www.imdb.com/gallery/mptv/1123/M ... ,%20George

one of these days ill figure out how to post a pic....

Mr Bacon · Post by **Mr Bacon** » July 18, 2005, 7:05 pm

I'm am on a 3 lane highway. There are two cars in front of me - a Honda Civic and a big ass jesus-fish sporting soccer-mom van. We are in lane #2 (Middle). A red light comes up. All three of us stop. Jesus fish van (directly in front of me) stops a bit early, slows down traffic behind me, and swings into the left lane. Green Light. Jesus fish van speeds up enough to be half-in front of the civic now in front of me (In other words: Van and Civic run side by side, but the van is slightly ahead). Jesus fish van decides it's time to get back in the middle lane. Jesus fish van decides to push civic into the right lane and coming within inches of contact. Jesus fish van then slams on the breaks and gets in the right lane to make a turn.

Thank you, Jesus fish van.

Abelard · Post by **Abelard** » July 23, 2005, 1:03 am

The worst type of driver is always the old man with a hat variety.

Janx · Post by **Janx** » July 23, 2005, 1:14 am

Canelek wrote:I am still stunned that people actually still believe that there is some kind of SUPREME BEING in a fictitional non-space(aka heaven) that reigns terror on the populace in the form of EVIL (Figure 1.(Supreme Being pics not available at this time.))

Figure 1.

That movie FUCKING OWNED. <3 Time Bandits.

VeeshanVault

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