Anyone else read Ivan's diary?

What do you think about the world?
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Brotha
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Anyone else read Ivan's diary?

Post by Brotha »

This guy is truly amazing and reading a lot of his diaries have really put life into perspective for me. I started reading them several months ago and have been a loyal reader ever since.

Ivan was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor a little over 2 years ago and he's been keeping a diary ever since, and makes an entry about every month, sometimes more. He knows he doesn't have long to live, but he's making the best of it and it's really an inspiration.

Here's his latest entry. On the side of the page you can view all of his previous entries, and at the bottom you can view comments people have made, or you can send your own.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/4138959.stm
When I wrote the time before last, I gave the awful news I so hoped to keep away in the distance.

We had been hoping for a breather. Maybe six months of calm before the storm.

Instead there was a cancer relapse so virulent and unexpected that for an instant no-one seemed sure what to say.

But as I write, 2005 dawns. I have had five weeks to adjust and they feel like months.

My kind and brave father and mother let me tell the story of another cancer.

My father was diagnosed with cancer of the bowel around two months ago.

We are optimistic about his prognosis. He begins chemo on 7 January and we hope fervently that his treatment will go well.

But no-one is the same again after a cancer diagnosis.

Tsunami death toll

Dad is early on the road. I am an old timer now for what I have.

We all have a lot to deal with.

But it is as if life has an automatic sense of scale and proportion.

As I read, the number of people known to have died in the destruction from Somalia across to Indonesia appears to be 150,000.

Hundreds of thousands more are bound to die in the diseases that follow.

I do not have the life I want. I would love to be able to plan for birthdays and Christmases to come.

My daughter is almost three and I still cannot believe she will share her third birthday with me very soon.

But I have hope and joy in the uncertainty. I have great hope and faith that I have much to achieve before the end.

How different to those hundreds of thousands struggling to stay alive and those who have to bury the dead.

I reached the age of 35 without calamity and only a freak accident of genetics blew me off course.

My life now is hard but it is fulfilling and I am happy in my short term way.

The uncertainty of my life is a blessing. I have plans and hopes.

Warning system

I used to fear I would never see my son's birth.

Now there will be a fight but it is one which might still see me show up at his first birthday.

How completely different to being in a world where a lack of a warning system meant no-one could be warned in time?

Everyone should have known the tsunami was coming.

Next time they must.

I do not know if science will uncover enough about my cancer to slide the dial just far enough for me.

But we have the technology that could have warned millions about the quake.

Next time people must be given a chance.
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Brotha
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Post by Brotha »

Bump.

Very sad news indeed :cry:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/4211475.stm
This is my last diary.

I have written it ahead of time because I knew there would be a point when I was not well enough to continue.

That time has now come.

When I began writing about having a brain tumour, I did not really know why.

That personal style of journalism was never something I was particularly attracted to or interested in reading myself.

But when I was diagnosed back in 2002 I had a strong urge to fight back against what felt like the powerlessness of the situation.

I really wanted to try to make something good out of bad.

I was not sure if what I wrote would be any good and I was not sure if anyone would read it but I wanted to try.

And I also very much wanted to use the diary to maintain my link with my job if I was not well enough to work.

Optimism in dark circumstances

I know now that people have found the diary useful, and it meant a lot to me in particular to know that there were people in a similar situation to me or caring for such people who got something out of it.

The regular feedback from dozens and dozens of people every time I have written has been wonderful, especially in real times of crisis.

I know that it has kept me going much longer than I would have without it and I am grateful.

I am grateful to many people and this is probably the time to let them know.

My oncologist has been superb in his ability to generate optimism in dark circumstances and to provide me with invaluable respite, as has his colleague my neurosurgeon, who has more than once pulled nasty lumps of cancer out of my head with astonishing skill.

I did not see all the members of the teams involved in the craniotomies I had but I know what a superb job they did and how they kept me in comfort and without pain afterwards. They and all the staff involved in my operations and aftercare were first class.

My GP has been unstinting in his support and without his prompt action at the beginning of my drama I believe I would have done nowhere near as well.

The support and professionalism of Macmillan nurses is legendary and mine has been no exception. I clicked with him the minute I met him.

My plea

I would also like to say thank you both to the many colleagues and friends at the BBC who have been such a support and especially to the people who manage the department I work for, for their personal support way beyond the call of duty.

What I wanted to do with this column was try to prove that it was possible to survive and beat cancer and not to be crushed by it.

Even though I have to take my leave now, I feel like I managed it.

I have not been defeated.

Thank you once again to everyone who helped me and came with me.

The last phase now will, I know, not be easy but I know that I will be looked after as I always have been.

I will end with a plea. I still have no idea why I ended up with a cancer, but plenty of other cancer patients know what made them ill.

If two or three people stop smoking as a result of anything I have ever written then the one of them who would have got cancer will live and all my scribblings will have been worthwhile.
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Post by Siji »

If two or three people stop smoking as a result of anything I have ever written then the one of them who would have got cancer will live and all my scribblings will have been worthwhile.
Imagine that.
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