Best Worst Pick-Up lines

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Rivera Bladestrike
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Best Worst Pick-Up lines

Post by Rivera Bladestrike »

A couple friends and I were discussing funny pick up lines, and we got a ton of good laughs...

So what are your favorite, good or bad pick-up lines?
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Post by Sabek »

Hey baby, do you clean your pants with Windex?

Cause I can see myself in them.
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Post by Pherr the Dorf »

You have to know Santa Cruz to truely appreciate this. Front Street Pub, downtown SC, sorta cute dirty hippy chick, older leech

"So, you live indoors?"
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Post by Zamtuk »

Hey, do you wanna go play Pearl Harbor?

What's Pearl Harbor?

It's where I sit in a chair and you blow the shit out of me.
Fuck Michigan!
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Post by Rivera Bladestrike »

Zamtuk wrote:Hey, do you wanna go play Pearl Harbor?

What's Pearl Harbor?

It's where I sit in a chair and you blow the shit out of me.
hahhaha
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Post by Kaldaur »

If you ever want to see your kids again, you'll do what I want.
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Post by Xzion »

Zamtuk wrote:Hey, do you wanna go play Pearl Harbor?

What's Pearl Harbor?

It's where I sit in a chair and you blow the shit out of me.
lmao fuckin priceless
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Post by Rivera Bladestrike »

"Will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into that cheap motel room."

"Mind if I stand here until it's safe where I farted?"
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Post by Canelek »

Wanna go out in my boat for some offshore drilling? :P
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Post by Zamtuk »

I have a 9 inch penis.
Fuck Michigan!
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mine

Post by Sendarie »

Hi, did you know I can lick my eyebrows?
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Post by Zamtuk »

You might as well do the things I am going to tell everyone else we did.
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another

Post by Sendarie »

Is the answer to "Will you sleep with me?" the same as the answer to this question?
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Post by Pilsburry »

"Nice shoes, wanna fuck?" (Women love compliments)

Or you lick your finger and touch thier shoulder then say..
"Hey baby, how about me and you get out of these wet clothes"
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Post by Drolgin Steingrinder »

"My dick may not be very big, but I have a tongue like a german shepherd."
IT'S HARD TO PUT YOUR FINGER ON IT; SOMETHING IS WRONG
I'M LIKE THE UNCLE WHO HUGGED YOU A LITTLE TOO LONG
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Post by Pahreyia »

worst one used on me:

"Hey baby, wanna got 50/50 on a rape charge?"
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Post by Terarle »

Hey Baby, Want to help me put the pimp back in my limp?
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Post by Sylvus »

While it's really lame now, my favorite that I heard for the first time in high school was:


"That shirt is very becoming on you"

"Thanks"

"Of course, if I were on you I'd be coming too"



I have another that I just heard recently that I'll add, when I remember
"It's like these guys take pride in being ignorant." - Barack Obama

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Post by Pilsburry »

"Do you have any Irish in you?"

"no"

"Do you want to?"

(being that I'm part irish, if your italian or german, use that...)
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Post by Traz-KOE »

Hey baby, do you clean your pants with Windex?

You look like the sort of dumb bitch that would do a stupid thing like that.
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Post by beasted »

there's really no topping the pearl harbor one. =p
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Post by vn_Tanc »

My face is leaving in 5 minutes.
Be on it.
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Post by kyoukan »

HIM: Hey baby you look like you have a little greek in you.
ME: No.
HIM: Well would you like some?
ME: OH SNAP!
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Post by noel »

1: Fuck me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Guinivere?

2: Me: Did it hurt?
Her: Did what hurt?
Me: When you fell from heaven?
Oh, my God; I care so little, I almost passed out.
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Post by Tegellan »

Me: i am sorry to break this to you, but i am afraid your father was a thief.

Her: Wtf? (or something to that effect)

Me: He stole 2 stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.
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Post by Zamtuk »

*Check tag on shirt*

Oh, I thought it said made in heaven.

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Post by Gnomies »

Were your parents retarded? Because you sure are special.
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Post by Mort »

Man: Wanna go out for a pizza, then fuck?

Woman: WHAT?!? No.

Man: What's wrong, you dont like pizza?
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OR, If the penis size topic get's brought up, there is only 1 answer.....

"It's not very big around, but it's short"
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Post by Xyphir »

If I told you that you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?
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Post by emmer »

ME: Hey baby, where have you been all my life?
HER: Hiding from you.
ME: OH SNAP!
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Post by Voronwë »

Hi, my name is Pilsbury



I kid :twisted:
Last edited by Voronwë on September 22, 2003, 2:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Post by Skogen »

Pherr the Dorf wrote:You have to know Santa Cruz to truely appreciate this. Front Street Pub, downtown SC, sorta cute dirty hippy chick, older leech

"So, you live indoors?"
lmao!!

I am sure you know about that community of people the live up behind UCSC in the trees. Yes, up in the trees. Sort of wood-elf style.
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Post by Pilsburry »

"Come on babe, I'm small, I got no stamina..I'll be in and out real fast and you'll hardly feel a thing"
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Post by Hayley »

This is not really a pick-up line, more like a pick-up action. Either way, I TOTALLY fell for it....no I'm not blonde. :P

This guy and I had been flirting back and forth at a party. All of a sudden, he places his hand over his eye and he's saying, "ack! something got in my eye!" So I get really close to him saying, "are you ok?" Then he opens his eye up slowly and asks if I can get a closer look to see if I can see anything there. So I move in closer and WHAM! He lays a kiss on me. I kissed him back kind of giggling about it. How naive I was at 18!
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Post by Chidoro »

How'd you like to be the first human sock puppet?
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Post by Ebumar »

Wtf chid lmao
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Post by BeatSoggybiscuit »

if we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
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Post by Krindol »

Nice shoes, wanna fuck?
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Post by Sabek »

Wanna help me practice my math?

We go back to my apartment subtract our clothes, add a bed, divide your legs and start to multiply.
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Post by Seebs »

This is not really a pick-up line, more like a pick-up action. Either way, I TOTALLY fell for it....no I'm not blonde.

This guy and I had been flirting back and forth at a party. All of a sudden, he places his hand over his eye and he's saying, "ack! something got in my eye!" So I get really close to him saying, "are you ok?" Then he opens his eye up slowly and asks if I can get a closer look to see if I can see anything there. So I move in closer and WHAM! He lays a kiss on me. I kissed him back kind of giggling about it. How naive I was at 18!
Ack .. Something got on my zipper ...
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Post by Sylvus »

I think I found the worst pickup lines.

Some of my favorites include:
inlovewithgod.com wrote:honesty is like a kiss on the lips...and baby i never lie (Proverbs 24:26 "He who gives a right answer kisses the lips. ")
hello, will you be my shulamite?
God was showing off when he made you.
before tonight, i never believed in predestination.
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Post by Deneve »

Xyphir wrote:If I told you that you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?
buh-doom-tish!

hehe, punnery owns!
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Post by cid »

Me: Excuse me miss, do you know why women prefer bald me?

Her: No why?

Me: They have a place to put their gum on the way down

Her: Slap!
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Post by Truant »

First heard this at freshman orientation before adventuring off on the fun that is college. My freshman advisor told me this one before they had some stupid freshman social thing.

Excuse me miss, is that a keg in your pants? 'Cause I'd really like to tap that ass.
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Post by Vaemas »

LOL Tru
High Chancellor for Single Malt Scotches, Accounting Stuffs and Biffin Greeting.
/tell Biffin 'sup bro!
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Post by Spang »

If i was a cup of coffee, would you be my sugar?

Do you believe in love at first sight or do you want me to leave and come back?

How do you like your eggs - poached, scrambled or fertilized?
Make love, fuck war, peace will save us.
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Post by Zamtuk »

That was a dubious post....
Fuck Michigan!
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Post by Akaran_D »

Guy: Want a drink?
Girl: Sure
Guy: Ok. Kneel down and let me open up the tap.
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Post by Jassun »

guy: (walks up to girl) hey baby, wanna go back to my place and fuck?

girl: (slaps guy) fuck off, jerk

guy: (yelling after girl who is walking away) so i guess a blowjob is out of the question?
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Post by Morgrym »

Are your legs tired? You have been running through my mind all night.

Sorry, but I could not help notice me noticing you.

How many drinks do I have to feed you before you go home with me?

Hot Damn, Slippery Nipple...no, they are drinks :roll:

You ever fucked a stranger? Hi, my name is ________

Is your shirt felt? (rub hand on breasts at this point)
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