Hour by Hour

No holds barred discussion. Someone train you and steal your rare spawn? Let everyone know all about it! (Not for the faint of heart!)

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Kylere
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Hour by Hour

Post by Kylere »

I have not had a cigarette in 40 hours.

OMG I open paint three times trying to get notepad open to write this....

I hate people that used to smoke and now are all rabid and antismoking, how dare they presume to have greater will power than I just because I smoke. Levels of willpower are only applicable to not smoking when someone does NOT want to smoke.

I hate people who smoke and feel superior about it.

I hate people who hate smokers and have never smoked.

I hate sunny days and bunny rabbits.

I WANT TO SMOKE!!!

But I have made the conscious decision not to smoke, not from choice or economics but from pure and utter logic. I want extra cash, I want a sweeter mouth to kiss the strawberry lips of my beloved, I want to live a longer life so that I can make love to her for years more.

I hate the fact that anything has this level of power over me, I hate it almost as much as I hate my ex-wife, no scratch that, I hate nothing as much as I hate her, if she had been a decent human being I would have quit a decade ago and been over this now.

I dare one person who is a drinker to say anything to me either way about smoking, they have their crutch and when they kick it, they can call me and commiserate, until then they are worse than any smoker.

GIVE ME A CIGARETTE!!!

NOOoooOOOOo!

Okay I am cool, no need for a smoke, I feel like I am letting Denis Leary down, at one point like him I was going to be hiding under my bed while they bricked me in, screaming "I have a full cigarette machine and you cannot get me!!!" but now I am trying to end a 19 year obsession.

Hmm my smoking habit is old enough to vote, it votes "KEEP SMOKING" with each throb of my heart

But my brain screams NOooooOOOOoo, and then my veins scream YesssssSssssss.

I think it was Keith Richards who said that cigarettes are harder to kick than heroin, and if anyone knows he would.

I want to sue those who sue tobacco companies over the habit for being morons; it causes me emotional distress that people that dumb can breath, much less smoke. When they win? My God, can we just for a second see our justice system may be a little hosed? Be right back, going to McD’s to spill some coffee on my crotch.

I estimate smokes cost me $2400 last year, not counting lighters, ashtrays, cleaning bills and a nice burn on my oak desk, $2400, you know, $2400 is a lot of lap dances.

Fattest human being I work with, says “Just get some gum” Hmm then he gets offended when I tell him next time instead of eating that 3rd pizza maybe he could chew some damn gum instead.

No one can help you quit smoking, they can wish you luck; they can curse your name, in the end only you can do it. Support groups are a bunch of people who failed to do it on their own, and want to have others to whine to about it.

Oh yeah, patches, gums, inhalers, oh yeah, come on Opie, you think I want to be addicted to seeping chemicals through my epidermis, chewing gum that tastes like nasty feet dragging through an ashtray, or spending 50 times as much on tubes of plastic to breath through.

I have not had a cigarette in 41 hours.
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Post by Moongrinn »

Grats on making it that far, just curious, did you quit cold turkey?
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Post by Vaemas »

Not much to say here Ky. Just figured I'd paste a URL I've kept. Very close friend of mine quit back May of last year and she used to keep track of how long she'd been "smober" at this site. Figured I'd pass it on to someone else who quit.

http://clbe.net/smobometer.htm
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Post by kyoukan »

I haven't had a cigarette in 2.5 years and I still want one so badly that my craving for has almost manifested itself into a physical entity; ready to crawl out of my throat when I'm asleep and build a nest in a tobacco field.

That's what you have to look forward to.

ahahahahahah.
Last edited by kyoukan on July 17, 2003, 11:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Post by Kylere »

Now at 47 hours, I ran out of smokes at 11pm two nights ago, and started to get dressed t go buy a pack, then I started thinking to myself, and decided I needed to grow up ( I am 33) and now that I have kicked the weight thing down to healthy again, it was time to finish growing up and quit smoking.

Booze, EQ, Weight, Smoking dropped like bad habits that they are. When you are facing huge changes in life I have found it is best to knock them all out at once rather than living in a constant state of change, just do everything you want to in 12 months.

But yes, I am going nuts, and smokes have way too much damn power over people, and no I will never be a rabid antismoker, but yes, I would beat the living hell out of a tobacco grower if I met one.
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Post by Kwonryu DragonFist »

Keep goin Kylere!

You can do it!

Do not succumb to the Power of the Smoke!
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Post by kyoukan »

that site is pretty cool

SMOB-omet-ER for taylor
Last cigarette.......... Thursday, December 28, 2000 3:00:00 PM
SMOBER...................2y 6m 20d 4h 2m 51s
Cigarettes not smoked... 18622.5396
Amount saved............ 5586.76
Life reclaimed (days)... 64.6616

Time is now........... Thursday, July 17, 2003 7:02:51 PM

oddly enough I would pay twice that for one cigarette right now if I knew it would not hook me again.
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Post by noel »

Kylere wrote:Now at 47 hours, I ran out of smokes at 11pm two nights ago, and started to get dressed t go buy a pack, then I started thinking to myself, and decided I needed to grow up ( I am 33) and now that I have kicked the weight thing down to healthy again, it was time to finish growing up and quit smoking.

Booze, EQ, Weight, Smoking dropped like bad habits that they are. When you are facing huge changes in life I have found it is best to knock them all out at once rather than living in a constant state of change, just do everything you want to in 12 months.

But yes, I am going nuts, and smokes have way too much damn power over people, and no I will never be a rabid antismoker, but yes, I would beat the living hell out of a tobacco grower if I met one.
I don't envy you at all. I think seeing my father quit cigarettes cold-turkey is what convinced me to never, ever even think about trying them.

Keep fighting it man, but one thing my dad did was get like regular chewing gum, and he'd pop it in his mouth whenever he wanted a cigarette.
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Post by Bubba Grizz »

I don't feel your pain, never having smoked before. I do however respect your pain and what you are trying to do. I wish you luck.
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Post by Kylere »

Let's see once every time I want a smoke, Aranuil, not sure I could chew 169700 sticks of gum, because I have wanted a smoke ever second for 2 days, I woke up in the dead of night last night in a deep sweat in a cold house and the very first thing I did was want a smoke.

I wanted one just now, I stopped typing for a sec and actually reached for a nonexistant pack. If I make it through this and die in some silly accident 12 months from now I am gonna be pissed I did not spend that year smoking heh.

Smob meter is pretty cool, I was up to 2 packs a day though, 3 packs a day at times. When I played EQ, I could kill 2 packs of smokes in one North ToV run, and three packs waiting for people to arrive to the Ntov run heh.
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Post by Tuberok »

Hang in there and much respect for kicking the habit. Do not be too hard on yourself if you lapse. Took me two times to quit. First time I quit for almost a year, thought I had it beat and lapsed.. Second time, two years smoke free and counting.

Hang in there!
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Post by kyoukan »

It's a psychological thing. There's two aspects to wanting to smoke, the chemical addiction and the physical addiction. The chemical addiction is hardest to overcome because it is fairly intense (nicotine is the most addictive chemical known to man), but the physical addiction is the most torturous because it will probably haunt you forever. Your brain never forgets how great it feels when it's fed nicotine and will never stop wanting it.

Don't substitute anything for smoking ever.. no gum, no candy, no patches. because if you do, then you are basically constantly reminding yourself and your body that you need to smoke. you don't have to convince yourself that you don't want to smoke. no smoker wants to smoke. you have to convince yourself that you don't need to smoke. if you use other ways to relieve you craving for cigarettes then you are basically telling your sub-conscious that you want a cigarette.

This is the best book you will ever buy. I will virtually guarantee you that you will never smoke again after reading it, even if you had no intention of quitting. His insights and philosophies into why we smoke and how we can stop ourselves from doing it using nothing but self-control are simply amazing.
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Post by Atokal »

That is great Kylere, keep going man. I am going to quit soon as summer is over. Hoping the chill Canadian air and the fact I have to go outside to smoke will help. BTW did you think about using the patch and/or Zyban.

Studies have shown that when two quitting aids are used people have a 70% chance of quitting for good. While using just one it drops considerably to 30%. Study my doctor showed me when I tried to quit last year. Had an alergic reaction to the zyban and ended up in the hospital, so be careful if you try that route.

/cheer Kylere :D
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Post by Sionistic »

how about when you feel like a smoke, get up and do some exercise? its hard to concentrate on something when your out of breath
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Post by Jugata »

I quit about 4 years ago now. Funny thing is I can have one whenever I want without picking it up again.
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Post by Animalor »

I've never smoked and I hate unconsiderate smokers.
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Post by Kyria »

Kylere, I have never smoked, but my brother is a heavy smoker with 3 young children and I wish he had your courage. You have my complete respect for doing this for yourself.

Oh, and those things you said about your 'beloved'... very very romantic! Lucky girl:)
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Post by Xzion »

ive had like 8-10 cigareetes in my life when i was like 16 (tobacco ones that is 8) ) not counting the times some dumbass makes a joint mixed with cigar and pot and i always end up inhailing the fucking cigar

and after that i really wanted another cigareete, but just said fuck it i dont want to have to rely on something like that, but sometimes i still want one, strange little basterds
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Post by Ebumar »

Ky, I give you props man. I've tried like 6 or 7 cigarettes in my life, and every once in a while, I look at someone smoking and almost ask him/her for one. It is pretty bad. If you can quit after smoking for as long as you have, that's awesome. My mom smoked for 12 years and quit cold turkey. My dad has smoked for 36 years, and has not been able to quit at all. Just stick with it man.
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Post by Rojer »

Kylere bro, I wish you best of luck man, the way I see it, I am still addicted to EQ and its been 4 yrs. I picture cigarettes being about as bad as EQ. I do not even want to ATTEMPT to quit EQ any time soon. Even if my whole guild leaves when we beat time.
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Post by vn_Tanc »

I tried quitting again about a month ago but after 3 days I was bent double with uncontrollable fury, which is kind of unfair on my work colleagues at deadline crunch time so I gave up quitting.
I'll give it another shot when work gets a little more sane I think.

I just fucking love to smoke >< My parents bought me an engraved zippo for my 21st and told me never to give up because I'm a nicer person when I smoke :P

Had a friend who quit 5 years ago and the thought doesn't even cross his ind any more. Then I had a friend's dad who quit in order to get married (ultimatum!) and said he still craved them 25 years later.

And now I've talked about it I'm off outside to smoke one.
(Additional Rant: WTF is up with not providing a small airless cupboard somewhere for smokers to smoke indoors eh? I work for a games company and at least 50% of the programmers smoke, as well as being generally pale, weak and nerdy due to the profession. Yet we're forced to smoke outdoors in subzero temperatures in winter which leads to lost work days through illness. It's just weird).
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Post by Izna Marcos »

Ya know i knew this guy, he went to a hyponist. I was really thinking it wouldn't work..but its been almost half a year and he just quit, poof, walked out of that office ,hasn't smoked once since. Says he doesn't even have the urge, in fact has a pack with like 6 in there...wont touch them.I thought it was pretty cool,never smoked myself, but still.
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Post by Jaxomer »

Good luck to you Kylere :)
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Post by Cotto »

I do the chewing gum thing when I want a cigarette, still costs fucking money though. And I say fair play to you for doing it without them.

Problem wih the chewing gum in the U.K is, they going to introduce gum tax :P
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Post by Chidoro »

You can do it little buddy!

I have until the end of July to quit. I need my system to clean itself out before the wife and I try to have kids. I started late though, 22 to be exact. The last time I quit, I was 26. I became rabid about excercise. I completely forgot how to hold the thing. My sister gave me one while waiting on line at a theme park about 6 months later and BOOM, right back into it. They used to cost under $3 a pack just 7 years ago. In NJ, they're now nearly $6 and $7.50 in Manhattan. Just ridiculous.

But I HAVE to do it by the end of July. I was told that taking a deep breathe and holding it helps.
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Post by Kylere »

Well at 57 hours now still going like a energizer bunny of denying how much I want one.
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Post by Cartalas »

Kylere wrote:Well at 57 hours now still going like a energizer bunny of denying how much I want one.

Good Job!!! Just stay out of bars, thats a killer when you are trying to quit.
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Post by Phugg_Innay »

Gratz gratz gratz !! Keep up the power. I as well smoke like a chimney and I HATE that. I few summers ago I was trying the "weening off method" it was actually working to ... until my helper decided to bail for Europe for 3 weeks , and she brought back a guy. (they are now happily married). Keep us updated on how its going. With any luck your story will help some us us others have the willpower to do the same.

*edit* and Cart YOU stay out of bars , I know you just go in for the "glory Hole"
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Post by Fallanthas »

Hang in there Kylere!

I quit for eight years and made the stupid mistake of smoking a cigar while sitting around a campfire with friends, and now I get to do it all over again!

Most craving comes in cycles, usually lasting about three minutes. When it gets bad, keep reminding yourself it will get better soon.

The first three days are the worst. After that, keep reminding yourself that if you touch another cigarette, you get to live those first three days all over again.

Grats on 'staying clean' Kyoukan. People who have never dealt with a tobacco addiction can't really comprehend how hard it is to give em up.
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Post by valryte »

If you ever saw the anti-smoking commercial with the lady who smokes a cigarette through her throat, that would be enough to keep you from smoking. I got to see it once when I was in California on business. Man that shit was freaky. I wish I had a copy of it to post it.
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Post by Fairweather Pure »

Smoking disgusts me and I generally find it rather rude. When I see parents smoking 2 feet from thier baby's face, Iwant to go on a rampage.

Anyway, I'm happy to hear you're trying to quit. My GF smoked for about 8 years before she met me and quit with no problems what-so-ever. Well, at least that I could tell, she may have a different take on things ;)

Anyway, I told her not to quit because of me, but if she wanted to use me as an excuse, then feel free. I've never even seen her smoke. If she would've done that when we first started dating, I would have ended it and moved on. It's one of those things I refuse to compromise on.
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Post by Cartalas »

Phugg_Innay wrote:Gratz gratz gratz !! Keep up the power. I as well smoke like a chimney and I HATE that. I few summers ago I was trying the "weening off method" it was actually working to ... until my helper decided to bail for Europe for 3 weeks , and she brought back a guy. (they are now happily married). Keep us updated on how its going. With any luck your story will help some us us others have the willpower to do the same.

*edit* and Cart YOU stay out of bars , I know you just go in for the "glory Hole"

There is not much Glory in your hole anymore since it has been deregulated and open for public access.
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Post by Skogen »

You can make it Kylere!! I have a couple of friends who went cold turkey, and the first couple of months was hell. They both made it, and haven't smoked for two years...but when we all get together, and someone in our gang busts out a smoke, they still get a craving

I've smoked on and off for a couple of years. I'll gor for a while having a smoke after dinner or at parties, then go totally without for a few months, then go back, etc.
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Post by Sylvus »

Keep it up, man. I've "quit" so many times it isn't funny, and i'm still smoking. Being at the bar is usually what gets me smoking again, but it sounds like you have quit drinking too so that might make it easier. The first three days generally are the hardest. I'm no scientist but it seems like that's about how long it takes me before I'm no longer constantly thinking about smoking and it's only difficult when I'm in a situation where I would have had one before. After eating, driving in my car, at the bar, etc.
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Post by Mort »

Good luck Magi Brother..... 2 things.

My pops used to tell me when trying to quit... "The urge will go away whether you smoke one or not."

Also, take a sheet of paper. Put a line down the middle and put the reasons you like smoking on the left side, and the reasons to NOT smoke on the right. Which list is longer? Im a fucking hypocrit, I've smoked since I was 15, quit 2 times for over a year but ended up picking it up again in the bars in Santa Cruz/San Fran.

Alcohol+Women+Smoking=TehWin


Fuck I need to quit.
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Post by Aireanna Wyndcather »

Ive been smoking for 4 years and Im only 19. Ive tried to quit but I live in a house full of smokers so its hard. I did quit for a few months but I started up again. Its a gross habit, but its really addictive. Hoping to stop soon hehe.

BTW why in the bottom right cornor of the banner, is there a picture of my dog?? I noticed it the other day hehehe.
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Post by Fizzlewhip »

Keep in there

For me, it was watching my father die in the hospital from lack of oxygen. After smoking for 50 years, he quit, and lived another 9, but the damage was already done.

His lungs lost all elasticity, and hardened. Even with oxygen, it wasn't enough. I was living in England at the time, and my (ex)wife and I had to fly in with our daughter. She (my daughter) had not even met her grandfather yet, since I had been living in Europe for 6 years and had not been able to get home due to money situation.

We arrived in time though. My father was hooked up to catheters and tubes, and most days was not lucid. Some days it was like talking to a 5 year old. But one day, he was lucid, and my daughter got to see the man I grew up with.

It was hard seeing a man who retired from the Air Force, held down numerous jobs, played computer games, and did crossword puzzles in pen (and only doing the across), in the state he was in. I am just glad my daughter got to see him during a lucid moment.

He died on the day we were going to visit him again. My sister was there when he let out his last breath. I am unsure if she was lying to make it more acceptable, but she said that when the sun entered his room that morning, and shown upon his face, He opened his eyes, smile, sighed, and then just stopped breathing.

At the funeral, my daughter turned to me and said, "Daddy, you quit smoking. I don't want you to end up like Grandpa". I haven't touched a cigarette since, and I have had no desire to.

But...I will never push my personal choice upon anyone.
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Post by Truant »

Personally I think going cold turkey is the way to go...I'm not sure I would have been able to quit had I used a patch or pill...I needed to stop nicotine from being in my body immediately and permanently...

I would say to those of you who have been trying, or are thinking about trying....work on cutting down first...pay attention to when and how often you smoke...try and cut it down to say 1/4 or 1/3...or if you aren't really smoking that much, maybe 1/2...keep cutting until you feel pretty comfortable with just stopping.

I won't lie though...there are times when I'd like to feel the buzz again...but it's a feeling that is definately controllable.

Just make sure when you get off work that you do something to keep yourself occupied...if you just go home and sit there and watch tv, or fuck around on the computer...your brain will be idle and it will haunt you...go fuck around...it doesn't matter if you go to the driving range...or whatever...just don't let your brain be idle...if you can take your mind off it, it will be that much easier.
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Post by Kylere »

108 Hours!!!!!

Phew still not fun!
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Post by Drolgin Steingrinder »

You have my sympathy! I smoke (way too much), and there are times when I really hate it. On the whole, my resolve isn't strong enough to quit at this time - I also belong to the school of thought that says that cold turkey is the way to go, but beginning that sort of ordeal without a firm resolve is a venture destined for failure.

I did quit once for around 3 months; I'd lost my job, my apartment, my girlfriend, and everything was generally shitty, so I figured I might as well quit smoking as well since my misery was already off the charts. Turned out I was wrong - quitting was worse than the sense of degradation I felt!
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Post by Rasspotari »

haven´t seen a good flame recently ... so here i go making myself the target of one.

YOU ARE WEAK !!!
smoking is a habit a hard habit but a habit just the same, cut the habit !
YOU ARE WEAK !!!
smoking is disgusting, dont be disgusting
YOU ARE WEAK !!!
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Post by Skunki »

smoking sucks, when i tried to quit i felt like an alien from the planet assholia that wanted to cut the heads off any living soul in my path and use them as a ciggarette!

I have cut down and prolly going to quit soon too.
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Post by Asheran Mojomaster »

kyoukan wrote:oddly enough I would pay twice that for one cigarette right now if I knew it would not hook me again.
Have you tried pot? :razz: It might not have what cigarettes have, but it makes ya feel a lot better and at least you can smoke it!

Edit : NM read your next post, seems you dont want any reminders of smoking at all.
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Post by Apollyon »

When I quit smoking cigarettes, the nicotine patches helped to ease the pain. Hard candy with a strong taste helped too during times that I'd crave one, like during my hour commute to work and back.

Anyways, good luck to you, and keep taking it one hour at a time. After about 3 days the cravings weaken, so you're well on your way!
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Post by Cartalas »

How goes it Kylere you make it throught the weekend smoke free.

We need a update, even though it sounds like this will be a habit you wil kick,
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Post by Kylere »

Hmm 10am EST, means 131 hours.

I want a cigarette at this moment no less than I did 131 hours ago, I want one like you want a gasp of air when being held underwater, I want one like our government wants to find the uber WMD cache, I want one like (sorry Kyoukan, but I cannot go this long without slamming ya heh:-) Kyoukan wants an orgasm ( or at least one one as much)

Really it sucks that people use smokes, I mean this is friggin ridiculous, this is the hardest stress of my willpower I have EVER faced, and that includes the crazy shiznat I did in the Army. I don't want to be all antismoking nazi but DAMN.

No one should face what people who quit smoking face.
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Post by Kilmoll the Sexy »

Peppermint candy and chewing gum will be your friend. You are getting close to what would be the end of the physical addiction. The mental part part will be much easier to kick if you have something to pop into your mouth whenever you feel the need to smoke. (must fight urge to make Fesuni comment)

Keep it going though man. I can tell you that it would only take you one time of watching someone die from lung cancer to end any desire to smoke. It is the hardest thing you could ever imagine.
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Post by Pilsburry »

I wish to hell they weren't addictive....

But probably 99% of smokers know that going in.

They also know cigs cost a shitload of money over time.

They also know they are killing themselves, and me if I stand close to them or in a crowded bar.

They also know they make themselves and everyone near them smell like a dirty ashtray.

Yet, they started anyway....

I guess the advertisements are just too good? Or do they really make people look cooler?

I seriously don't understand why people ever start smoking...

As for the drinking comment:
1. Alcohol isn't nearly as addictive, I can go months without even thinking about drinking.
2. Alcohol health concerns are much less than cigarettes.
3. Alcohol health conditions are limited to the drinker, not those around him.
4. Alcohol doesn't make you and all the people sitting near you smell like an ashtray...it's contained to the drinkers breath.

I've smoked once in my entire life, and it was only to prove a point, that there is no beneficial effect from smoking..

On the bright side Kylere, it's easier to quit when Corona, me, and Claritin dont smoke, your girl doesn't smoke, and smoking isn't allowed in your workplace....

I mean my dad would have a hell of a time quitting, the smoke break area is on his way between his desk and the bathroom, he has to walk right through it. Plus his wife smokes. And all his friends smoke.

The two most disgusting things I saw were as Valryte said the woman smoking a cig through a hole in her neck....and even worse...when I was a freshman in college I got stuck in the same hotel room with my dad, I was laying in bed awake when I hear all this coughing, my dad rolls out of bed, scratches his ass, walks to the table and lights up a cigarette...his eyes weren't even all the way open, and obviously I consider the coughing a sign to stop, not light another.

Anyway best of luck to you Kylere. I know you can do it if you put your full effort behind it. It should be easy compared to your diet.

P.S. Remember Jeff K. and Amanda from Tony Roma's when I was moving? They are quitting too, only your doing better than them, prove to me your a stonger person and actually kick the habit.
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Post by Aslanna »

Booze, EQ, Weight, Smoking dropped like bad habits that they are.
Weight and Smoking are bad. But booze and EQ aren't bad if you're able to practice moderation. Studies are showing that 1 or 2 drinks a day actually has a positive benefit. I doubt they'll find any positive benefits of playing EQ a few hours a day but it isn't much different than watching TV for a few hours.
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Post by Kylere »

Not many smoking drivers out there running over little kids. Alcohol is worse than cigarettes and I promise you that once cigarettes are gone, it will be the next major target. Prohibition does not work, but taxing things out of existance seems to be a functionable substitute.

Smoking is a much better habit than boozing, but they both suck.
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