In the tradition of bad fighting game movies. - DOA

Animalor · Post by **Animalor** » September 7, 2006, 3:49 pm

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdq5l3fQFPQ&eurl=

Something this bad absolutely begs to be seen.

Sionistic · Post by **Sionistic** » September 7, 2006, 11:21 pm

just, its, uh, and,
no fuck it, i cant even begin to describe how bad that was

Sartori · Post by **Sartori** » September 7, 2006, 11:51 pm

wow this movie looks insanely fucking good, i can't wait. I'll even buy popcorn.

Winnow · Post by **Winnow** » September 8, 2006, 3:04 am

From the pages of Wizard Magazine #179 (posted in the comics forum)

kyoukan · Post by **kyoukan** » September 8, 2006, 3:44 am

devon aoki is just not an attractive person and people need to stop fucking casting her in shit.

vn_Tanc · Post by **vn_Tanc** » September 8, 2006, 6:09 am

kyoukan wrote:devon aoki is just not an attractive person and people need to stop fucking casting her in shit.

I wouldn't kick her out of bed for farting.

Akanae · Post by **Akanae** » September 8, 2006, 10:05 am

That trailer reminded me a lot of D.E.B.S for some reason. I will go out of my way to not see this.

miir · Post by **miir** » September 8, 2006, 11:22 am

kyoukan wrote:devon aoki is just not an attractive person and people need to stop fucking casting her in shit.

She's the best looking one of that lot.

Mr Bacon · Post by **Mr Bacon** » September 8, 2006, 11:48 am

Should have just made the movie a volleyball tournament. Also, Jaime Pressly is too redneck to act anymore.

Drinsic Darkwood · Post by **Drinsic Darkwood** » September 8, 2006, 12:06 pm

miir wrote:
kyoukan wrote:devon aoki is just not an attractive person and people need to stop fucking casting her in shit.
She's the best looking one of that lot.

Perhaps I have unknowingly become gay recently, but Holly Valance looks infinitely more fuckable that Devon Aoki.

Do movies like this generate enough profit to really warrant being made? It looks pathetic. I believe I saw fucking lifebars in that trailer. It looks like something you'd find in Uwe Boll's repertoire.

Sargeras · Post by **Sargeras** » September 8, 2006, 12:09 pm

Drinsic Darkwood wrote:
miir wrote:
kyoukan wrote:devon aoki is just not an attractive person and people need to stop fucking casting her in shit.
She's the best looking one of that lot.
Perhaps I have unknowingly become gay recently, but Holly Valance looks infinitely more fuckable that Devon Aoki.

Winnow · Post by **Winnow** » September 8, 2006, 12:43 pm

Mr Bacon wrote:Should have just made the movie a volleyball tournament. Also, Jaime Pressly is too redneck to act anymore.

I totally agree with that. She oozes the trailer trash look to me for some reason. Sarah Carter looks like Al Bundy's daughter from Married w/Children.

I'm curious why they chose those particular DOA characters. Hitomi was the best and where the hell is Lei Fang?

I liked Devon Aoki in Sin City and liked her skirt in D.E.B.S. She's best in a non speaking role.

Hesten · Post by **Hesten** » September 8, 2006, 2:34 pm

Akanae wrote:That trailer reminded me a lot of D.E.B.S for some reason. I will go out of my way to not see this.

Lol, i was thinking the same, and i didnt even suffer though more than around 10 min of D.E.B.S.
I think i would actually pay money to NOT be forced to see this.

Kwonryu DragonFist · September 8, 2006, 5:09 pm

Jaime Presley looks best in this movie.

Dregor Thule · Post by **Dregor Thule** » September 8, 2006, 5:36 pm

Sarah Carter gets my vote. Devon Aoki looks a little out of place in the movie, but she's hardly not attractive.

Oh, and yes, this movie looks monumentally terrible.

Winnow · Post by **Winnow** » November 14, 2006, 1:50 pm

I watched this move last night (decent review copy available on the newsgroups).

It rates a 3/10 from me. It could have been much worse but wasn't.

Some of the later fight scenes were entertaining. Spoilers below but I doubt anyone's going to see this movie anyway. There are several references to DOAX in the movie.

[hide]Lei Fang does make an appearance in the movie. She's on the plane that is straight out of DOAX where you have to parachute to Zach's Island. She doesn't have a speaking part and loses in the first round of the tournament to Gen Fu of which they only show about five seconds of.

Hitomi only shows up on the tournament board. She loses in the first round as well. Sucks that she wasn't in the movie. I guess a female with a German accent isn't considered sexy!

Hottest lady in the movie is the thief Christie. Yay for eye candy.

Devon Aoki does a pretty good job as Kasumi. She doesn't look like the character in the beginning of the movie but when they get to Zach's Island, she changes her appearance and looks good in the role. Her battles with Ayane are some of the better parts of the movie.

Jaime Presley, playing as the wrestler Tina, comes across as total trailer trash as expected but it fits into the movie well and she wasn't all that bad afterall.

Zach sucks in the movie. I picture him with Dennis Rodman's voice and this actor didn't get the job done at all.

Christie defeats Helena in a pretty weak battle but later in the movie, Helena kicks about 100 ninja asses by herself...I'm wondering what he problem was with beating Christy after seeing that display of fighting skill.

Ayane's purple hair looks as bad as it does in the games.[/hide]

The concept is kind of cool where at anytime, a contestant's wrist device will display their opponent and then it's "Game On" until one of the two contestants gets knocked out so they are fighting all over the place.

They spend about 3 minutes total covering the first round of the tournament (and there's not that many rounds) which is kind of a lame cost cutting measure as the movie is only 77 minutes long...not like they couldn't have squeezed in some more action.

The later rounds 2, 3 and the final are covered in more detail though.

Recommendation: Steal this movie or wait until it shows up on HBO or some other movie channel you have if you've played the DOA fighting/DOAX Volleyball games and are curious.

High cheese factor and poor character development drop it below the "just for brain dead entertainment" recommendation although it does manage 3/10 from me for some action scenes and scantily clad women jumping around the screen...again, only 77 minutes so they could have added plenty more scenes and characters (Lei Fang and Hitomi) to improve the movie.

Fairweather Pure · Post by **Fairweather Pure** » November 14, 2006, 2:25 pm

Any nudity or lesbo-type stuff?

Winnow · Post by **Winnow** » November 14, 2006, 2:34 pm

Fairweather Pure wrote:Any nudity or lesbo-type stuff?

Not really. Tina and Christie sleep in the same bed but nothing is shown and it's just used as a tool to make Tina's dad think she's a lesbo which, if true, remains unconfirmed in the movie. There's another misunderstanding soon after with Tina and Kasumi being seen together by Tina's father but Kasumi is just giving Tina acupuncture treatment without even a hint of sexual advances by either.

[hide]Tina later kicks her dad's ass as they end up matched against each other in the tournament.[/hide]

Kwonryu DragonFist · November 15, 2006, 1:25 am

Was the fight-scenes any good?

Did Sho Kosugi's "Pray for Death" "Revenge of the Ninja" son who played Ryu Hayabusa have any good fight-scenes?

Which chick was the best fighter in your opinion?

Anyone credible or was it wires all over