VeeshanVault

Got any good one liner Fortune Cookie saying(s)? Here are a few to get you started:

Wise man washes hands after he pees, smart man doesn't pee on hands.

To make egg roll, push it.

Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

Lady who live in glass house should dress in basement.

Girl laid in tomb may soon become mummy.

Secretary becomes permanent fixture, once mounted on desk.

he who goes to bed with itchy butt wake up with stinky finger

bird who fly upside down have quackup

. . .

yeah

You will be hungry again 30 minutes from now.

Quoted from a previous post by Taly:

Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.

Man who run in front of car get tired.

Man who run behind car get exhausted.

Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.

Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.

Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.

Man with one chopstick go hungry.

Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.

Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.

Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.

Panties not best thing on earth but next to best thing on earth.

War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.

Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.

Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.

Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.

Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.

Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.

Man who fart in church sit in own pew.

Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

I once got one that said nothing. It didn't even have numbers on it. When I went up to ask about it... all the lady did was stare at me with a horrified look on her face. So I guess I'm going to die...

Ebumar wrote:I once got one that said nothing. It didn't even have numbers on it. When I went up to ask about it... all the lady did was stare at me with a horrified look on her face. So I guess I'm going to die...

Yeah she was probably freaked out you were going to ask her to eat some of it. The Fortune Cookie is a westernized custom.

The lamest one I ever got was. "You enjoy fortune cookies"

My last fortune cookie was completely blank.

I have always gone by the rule that you are supposed to add "...in bed" to the end of your fortune cookie saying. Definitely makes things more interesting

You will find true love on flag day

Why today's flag day.
Excellent.

That wasn't chicken.

'www.goatse.cx'

I'm still having nightmares from that one.

I got one at this Thai place that I thought was pretty clever,

"In god we trust, all others must pay cash"