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Canada Eh!!

Posted: February 13, 2003, 2:28 pm
by Atokal
Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days. Eventually, Michael the archangel found him, resting on the seventh day.

He inquired of God, "Where have you been?"

God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Look Michael, look what I've made."

Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?"

"It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a place of great balance."

"Balance?" inquired Michael, still confused.

God explained, pointing to different parts of Earth, "For example, Northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while Southern Europe is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hot spot. Over there I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people," God continued, pointing to different countries. "This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice."

The Archangel, impressed by Gods work, then pointed to a large landmass in the top corner and asked, "What's that one?"

"Ah," said God. "That's Canada, the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful mountains, lakes, rivers, streams and an exquisite coastline. The people from Canada are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found travelling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard working and high achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace. I'm also going to give them super-human, undefeatable ice hockey players who will be admired and feared by all who come across them."

Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed; "What about balance, God? You said there will be BALANCE!"

God replied wisely. "Wait until you see the loud-mouth bastards I'm putting next to them...."

Posted: February 13, 2003, 2:34 pm
by Voronwë
worst post ever

Posted: February 13, 2003, 2:51 pm
by Arsecn
Image

Re: Canada Eh!!

Posted: February 13, 2003, 2:59 pm
by Cartalas
God replied wisely. "Wait until you see the loud-mouth bastards I'm putting next to them...."[/quote]



Russia is not that Bad

Posted: February 13, 2003, 3:06 pm
by Damiarch
I recall reading that same joke on this board a while ago.

Posted: February 13, 2003, 3:12 pm
by Voronwë
worst part about that joke is the length for such a lousy payoff:

reader's digest version:

God is busy in Heaven making the earth.
St Peter asks "wtf is that"
God says "Canada, it is really pretty much perfect"
St Peter says "god you r0xx0rs God"
God says "wait till you see the assholes i am putting next to you"
St Peter says "LOL!!!L!L!L!L!!O!O!!L!L!L!!"
St Peter walks off and mutters under his breath "fucking tool.."

Posted: February 13, 2003, 3:14 pm
by Aabidano
Condensed version was pretty funny :)

Posted: February 13, 2003, 3:22 pm
by Atokal
Have to admit Voro your version is better. :)

Posted: February 13, 2003, 3:48 pm
by Animalor
"Wait until you see the loud-mouth bastards I'm putting next to them...."
Nice of someone putting up the statement then all of you so bluntly proving it .

:D :D

Posted: February 13, 2003, 3:54 pm
by Voronwë
i would never deny being a loudmouth :p

Posted: February 13, 2003, 4:01 pm
by Kluden
The people from Canada are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous ...
Nice of Toker to put up that statement, and you disproving it...

:lol:

Of course, I'm just fucken with ya. I love Habs...you all gots good lumber.

Posted: February 13, 2003, 5:58 pm
by kyoukan
272

Posted: February 13, 2003, 6:16 pm
by masteen
272
Is that the pattern for Canadian haiku?

Posted: February 13, 2003, 6:18 pm
by Sylvus
I think that refers to the Over/Under that was posted a while back, in which case it was far under.

Posted: February 13, 2003, 6:20 pm
by Voronwë
no it was in reference to 272 worthless Atokal posts.

Posted: February 13, 2003, 6:53 pm
by Sylvus
Okay, I forget exactly what the Over/Under was about, it was something regarding Atokal posts. I assumed that perhaps Kyou didn't mind this one because it wasn't talking shit about Canada. My mistake, carry on.

Posted: February 13, 2003, 7:06 pm
by Taly
LOL go toker!

LOL

Posted: February 13, 2003, 9:07 pm
by wadana
LOL yes us canadian are a quiet bunch :P