VeeshanVault

BEEEP BEEEP

Have you killed a kiten today ???( going old school)

"Kill a Kitten"

By Stephen Lynch

When the game of like makes you feel like quittin'

it helps a lot if you kill a kitten.

Mark my words 'cause from where I'm sittin'

you can't go wrong if you kill a kitten.

There's no crime that you'd be committin.'

I know the law -- you can kill a kitten.

And if you need yarn for that scarf you're knittin'

you'll get plenty when you kill a kitten.

Feed it turpentine or break its spine.

Crush it with your shoe as long as you kill a kitten.

If the one you love isn't quite as smitten,

she'll like you better if you kill a kitten.

And I'll quote the bible 'cause that's where it's written,

if ye loveth Jesus ye must kill a kitten.











Flush it down the can.

Hit it with your van.

Drown it in a lake.

Bake a kitty cake.

Throw it at a train.

Make it snort cocaine.

Stick some TNT up its cat booty.

Do what you must do as long as you

kill a kitten.

Killing kittens isn't easy

and if the thought makes you feel queasy

grab a pitchfork from the shed

and kill a puppy dog instead.

Kill a kitten.

Kill a kitten,

a little furry kitten.

theres a lot I would do to a pussy, but I can't seem to find it in that list.

I've lost my cat before, but the little bastard keeps finding his way back!

I really never understood the whole "omg I h8 cats" .. or "I love cats.. they taste good" thing... why are cats hated by some people so much? I've never heard anyone say they want to flush a dog down the toilet or feed it turpentine. Where does this hatred for small furry creatures stem from?

Xouqoa wrote: Where does this hatred for small furry creatures stem from?

Canada!

I love cats: what other animal shows its loyalty/love to a person by killing something and bringing to you? I think a lot of people prefer dogs because the whole instant gratification: most dogs love people, love attention any time, any place. Cats are more independent and more variable in their responses to people: if you get a "people cat" its almost like a dog, while something like my cat comes to you when she wants and expects you to gtfa from her the rest of the time.

My cat's generally in the middle of the family room floor asleep with all 4 feet in the air. Not finding him would be a change.

Wulfran wrote:I love cats: what other animal shows its loyalty/love to a person by killing something and bringing to you? I think a lot of people prefer dogs because the whole instant gratification: most dogs love people, love attention any time, any place. Cats are more independent and more variable in their responses to people: if you get a "people cat" its almost like a dog, while something like my cat comes to you when she wants and expects you to gtfa from her the rest of the time.

My cat follows me around from the moment I get in the door until I fall asleep. He always keeps me in visual range.
He sleeps at the foot of the bed, he follows me to the bathroom and waits outside of the shower.

He's constantly head butting me and rubbing his fur all over me.


Basically, he's a littler trained dog that I don't have to take out for a walk.

Xouqoa wrote:I really never understood the whole "omg I h8 cats" .. or "I love cats.. they taste good" thing... why are cats hated by some people so much? I've never heard anyone say they want to flush a dog down the toilet or feed it turpentine. Where does this hatred for small furry creatures stem from?

I think it comes from having a bad experience with a mean cat when one was little. There are some grouchy cats out there, but often its just a cat thats tired of being pestered by some kid chasing it around and grabbing its tail. Same thing with dogs too. I've know a lot of people who don't care for big dogs because they are afraid.

I like em all

I like cats a lot. My cats like my familiar...follows me around the house then lays on me when Im sleeping...

Cats > Dogs IMO........

My cat follows my dog around - begs when my dog begs - whines to go out when my dog gets to go out - sleeps on the bed with me and occassionally dives into my bathtub. He ninja cuddles my dog when she is sleeping. HE IS FIERCE. I can understand why people would be afraid!

Chinchillas > All

Dogs > Cats

ferrerts R uber...

~Joramile

My cat's a mean little fucker. He's 14 years-old and will still take a big chunk out of your arm. I wish he had shorter hair though.

I used to have 2 cats, but when we moved about a year and a half ago, he never got used to the environment of the new house. He got sick, stopped eating, and eventually passed away. That's the worst part about having pets. It's like losing a family member.

My cat is very personable to me... but she doesn't really like other people too much. She's gotten a little better with roomies, but is still pretty fickled when it comes to them even. She acts like a dog to me though, usually.

I dated a guy who had an adorable young cat (just out of the kitten stage) who hated everyone but him. We were watching a movie, sitting on his bed, and he put his arm behind me (kinda around my waist). The cat had been sitting behind us and when he did that she started swatting his arm until he moved it away from me. It was hilarious.

I dislike "house" pets of all kinds. I dislike my sister's miniature collie as much as my friend's obese house cats. They are all equally useless.

Now my friend has a dog that I just love, because she can track deer, flush game brids, and even do some light retreival duties. That is an animal worth feeding.

masteen wrote:That is an animal worth feeding.

LOL! That's the funniest thing I read today. You done made my morning.

Color coded by sex, I didn't name them...my little sister and brother did age 10 and 15 (I'm 28 fyi). Snipes is short for "Wesley Snipes" because she is black and crazy, problem was she was a she and so I didn't like to call her by a guys name.

My cats are friendly, so far I have only had 2 cat haters over and both of them actually got down and started playing with them when I left the room, they said my cats are the only ones they ever liked.

Yes, that's my bedroom, and normally where you will find them if I'm not home. If I'm home they follow me from room to room.

They were kittens a stray cat had in my step-grandma's garage. They never try and go outside, but snipes does have a people food fetish so you can't leave the room if you have food out, but she won't attack your plate in front of you she will wait until your out of sight.

since i grew up with 4+ cats my entire life, cats > dogs in my opinion.
One of my cats right now is cross eyed so whenever you try and play with him he starts freaking out and over/underestimating jumps and where you are so he always jumps too far or not far enough or same when he swats at ya. Great Fun. I have 4 cats now and a yorky, good combo of pets heh.

Xouqoa wrote:I've never heard anyone say they want to flush a dog down the toilet or feed it turpentine. Where does this hatred for small furry creatures stem from?

Nowhere. Actually, that was written by a comedian who basically sings songs for an act.

evil kitty, gay blanket haha lol @ u xoyqoza

Cats Rule!

Cats >>> Dogs

My cat will jump up and stand in front of my monitor when it wants my attention. Not a problem unless you're Cartalas looking for a heal and I can't see my screen

I dislike cats, and pretty much any pet at all.

I once read a webpage that proved you could tell how fucked up a woman was by how many and what types of cats she had. I'll try and find it again because it was both funny and accurate.

Anybody that treats thier pets like people have issues IMO.

Metanis wrote:Cats Rule!

Cats >>> Dogs

My cat will jump up and stand in front of my monitor when it wants my attention. Not a problem unless you're Cartalas looking for a heal and I can't see my screen

Fucking Cat Id be 65 now if it wasnt for that ball of fur

Fairweather Pure wrote: Anybody that treats thier pets like people have issues IMO.

How about treating their people like pets?

Fairweather Pure wrote: Anybody that treats thier pets like people have issues IMO.

I treat my pets better than I treat most people! Course.. most people are assholes.

Over 30 posts on a cat thread and not a single Sylvos sighting?

For Sylvos

You gotta pat the pussy, but dont stimulate it in the wrong way

...

I dont think I should post a pic of my cat - hes already hated by too many.

Lol Sirensas cat owns! Cats own dogs so hardcore. ^^ http://www.mycathatesyou.com > all

http://www.cat-scan.com/

cliffyb > *.*

I like almost all cats. The only ones I dislike are the ones that no longer look like an animal but like some fluffy thing Zsa Zsa Gabor would wear in cold weather.

As for dogs...little runt dogs that yip and whine rather than bark need to die. All of them. Oh, and the feral dogs that remind you that all canines are, in fact, just one evolutionary step away from being a wolf (usually the ones running around unleashed with the owner frantically shouting "It's alright, he won't bite, just don't show him fear!") can scare the hell out of me...

my kitties. Drakk and Morrie





and yes, i am fingering his bum

Now if only they could invent the device that helps you lose a cat. Life with my girlfriend would be so much easier.

Millie wrote:Now if only they could invent the device that helps you lose a cat. Life with my girlfriend would be so much easier.

already invented. you need a garbage bag full of rocks and an ocean.

sirensa's cat is satan!

I've got 6 cats.. the one that has me marked as "hers" is tyhe only cat I know that can growl, pur, and draw blood at the same time. I love her tho.

OMG ADELA IS MANGINA!!?!????


No wonder he never returned my cyber tells.

OMG ADELA IS MANGINA!!?!????

Got cyb0r?

Adela wrote:my kitties. Drakk and Morrie



and yes, i am fingering his bum

Morrie: Did I say two fingers? Better make it three.

Adela already posted his IRL pic on the appropriate thread.

However this phrase caught my attention:

Now if only they could invent the device that helps you lose a cat. Life with my girlfriend would be so much easier.

If I remember Millie kept protesting she was an IRL female hottie. Of course she might still be...but that would be another story, and possibly a web cam.