"AUTHENTIC College Diploma and Embellished Frame- Bachelor"

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Spang
Way too much time!
Way too much time!
Posts: 4811
Joined: September 23, 2003, 10:34 am
Gender: Male
Location: Tennessee

"AUTHENTIC College Diploma and Embellished Frame- Bachelor"

Post by Spang »

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My fuckup is your gain, my friends. And as always, it's hand fucking made.

I had put up a listing in February for just the diploma, but after some attention from an "outside site", some killjoy reported me and this listing was removed for not being hand made or vintage. It really pissed me off, until I realized that I had the crafting power to fix it.

So, now instead of merely getting an authentic Illinois State diploma in Education, you get this GORGEOUS hand embellished frame, complete with sliver paint that will probably flake off and whatever random crap I had laying around my house. Why I have mini beer cans and tiny plastic babies is anyone's guess.


First things first... let's clear up a few things, shall we?

1. Yes, that really is my name.

2. I already know that I was an idiot for taking out student loans. But please, if the need strikes you to remind me, because 15 calls a day from Sallie Mae aren't *nearly* enough, I won't stop you from sending me a message to point out my stupidity.

But before you do, here's the back story:


I have my first degree in Theatre with a concentration in Acting. And before anyone makes a smartass comment like, "Well, gee... there's your first problem!" trust me, I'm well aware. After my husband got his master's, I returned to school to get my teaching degree so I could, you know... work. It is at this point that I should probably point out that, while my parents were able to help with my first degree, my decision to return to school came a year after my mother was diagnosed with a stage 4 brain tumor and two months after my dad lost the job he had had for nearly 40 years. So help from them was not an option.

Fair enough. I'm not afraid of hard work. I went to school full time and carried as many as three part time jobs while my husband worked a retail job full time. Then along comes the economy, crashing to the ground. As I was student teaching (a degree requirement that is *not* paid), we learned that my husband was losing his job due to the company closing his store. Ironically, his last day of work was the day I graduated.

We survived that summer living off unemployment and babysitting. I had (and continue to) applied to over 200 school districts across the country and had *1* interview.
I also happen to have the fortune of living in Illinois, which is currently not paying what it owes to the state school districts, which means teachers who *have* jobs are getting laid off (it's estimated that as many as 20,000 teachers across the state are going to be laid off this year due to budget cuts). Currently, I'm back to 3 part time jobs while my husband works two. We have moved to save money, given up most luxuries, and learned to do without. I haven't bought new clothes in three years. His car is a 1993 Chevy Shitbox that is held together by the collective will of everyone who rides in it. We manage.

In the meantime, Sallie Mae is nice enough to charge me 9.25% interest and capitalize that interest on to the principal balance. Last time I checked, there was over $10K IN INTEREST added to my balance. Since 2008. They have told me to give up my dogs to save money to send to them. They have told me to move back in with my parents. Or borrow it. Or FIND A HOMELESS SHELTER IN MY AREA and send them what I would be paying in rent. And the loan I took out is categorized as a "private loan", so there is nothing I can do except send them upwards of $1000 a month; the problem is, I don't even *make* that much.

Let's not forget the emotional toll this takes as well. The fact that I cannot live up to my responsibilities keeps me awake at night. The plan all along was to go to school so I could get a job, which is the only thing that's keeping me from making payments. No one graduates and thinks, "Hey! I want to be unemployed for two years!" I feel like a deadbeat. But I don't have any other options.

SO- This diploma, which is worth a pantload, according to good ol' Sallie, could be yours for the measly price of $50K. Or a full time job with benefits. I'd take either right now.
The Source
Make love, fuck war, peace will save us.
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