VeeshanVault

Booyah.

Other:

"My cats breath smells like cat food" -Ralph Wiggum

Bologna all the way

Other...Homer wrapping a stick of butter in a waffle. "mmm...fattening."

"Everything's coming up Milhouse!"


"There's nary an animal alive who can outrun a greased scotsman"


"This dude does the best Flanders"


"You better bacon up that sausage, boy"


"Ralph, Jesus did not have wheels"


"I'm a Mur-diddly-urdeler!"


"My cat's name is mittens."


"Disco Stu likes disco music"

Wow, Millie putting that together took some time (the UI for posting a poll I mean). Kudos!

Big thanks to Miir for filling in some of the blanks that I'd forgotten about. Oh, and I added another Stu-related option -- perhaps his best quote of all time.

"Homer if you could kill somebody on your way out it would really help me." -Hank Scorpio

or

Mr. Burns - "Smither's, do you think it was my power plant that killed those ducks?"
Mr. Smithers - "There's no doubt about it sir."
Mr. Burns(sniffling) - "Excellent."

(I'm sure I butchered the first quote and someone will flame me for it. hoorj.)

(Wall reads: NO BEER AND NO T.V. MAKE HOMER GO CRAZY)
Homer:"Pretty good, huh, Marge? All I need is a title. I was thinking along the lines of "No beer and no T.V. make Homer...something, something..."
Marge: Go crazy?
Homer:"Don't mind if I do!!! WAHHHHH!"

oh and this one

Mr. Burns: "Smithers, who is that man?"
Smithers: "Thats Homer Simpson, sir."

Apu: [introducing himself] Apu Nahasapeemapetilan.

Nigel: Hmmm. Never fit on a marquee, luv. From now on, your name is Apu de Beaumarchais.

Apu: That is a great dishonor to my ancestors and my god...but okay!

NO DUFFMAN!?!!?!?! Blasphemy! Heres my list:

Duffman: "Duffman... can't breathe... OH NO!"

Titania: "You promised if I slept with you I wouldn't have to touch the bum"
Duffman: "Duffman says a lot of things, OH YEAH!"

Duffman: "Thats a mug you DON'T wanna chug, OH YEAH!"

Duffman: "Duffman is thrusting in the direction of the problem"

Duffman: "New feelings brewing in Duffman, what....would Jesus do?"

Bart: "Do you think they could be involved in the Kennedy assassination in some way?"
Homer: "I do.... now"

Homer: "I'm going to... stalk ... Lenny and Carl. D'oh!"

I forget who said this: "What about the starving children?"
Homer: "They're with God now"

Scorpio: "Ever see a man wave goodbye to a shoe before?"
Homer: "Yes, once"

Homer: "Take THAT, Lisa's beliefs"

Homer: "They'll never know the simple pleasures of a monkey knife fight"

McBayne: "Ice to see you! (jumps out of ice sculpture of Venus deMilo)"

Homer: "Trying is the first step towards failure."

Lenny: "Oww, my eye, I'm not supposed to get pudding in it!"

Marge: "Is he a man eater?"
Tour Guide: "Only convicts and hobos"
Bart: "Do you have some hobo chunks we can throw to him?"

I could keep going but it would take way too long to name off all the great quotes from that show.

Homer: Got your nose.

Bart:Got your wallet.

::Bart flushs the wallet down the toilet::


Ralph"Ms.Hoover, my wurm crawled into my mouth, and I accidently ate it, can I have a new one?"

Jimbo"Way to breathe no breath."



...Glavin!

I like my beer cold…my TV loud…and my homosexuals flaming.
The code of the schoolyard, Marge! The rules that teach a boy to be a man. Let's see. Don't tattle. Always make fun of those different from you. Never say anything, unless you're sure everyone feels exactly the same way you do.

Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so that it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use

*And how is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?

Well you know boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like women. You just have to read the manual and press the right button.

Marge, you being a cop makes you the man! Which makes me the woman - and I have no interest in that, besides occasionally wearing the underwear, which as we discussed, is strictly a comfort thing.

Quiet you kids. If I hear one more word, Bart doesn't get to watch cartoons, and Lisa doesn't get to go to college.


Marge, I'm going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex. It's also the food preparation.


Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. Contrary to what you've just seen, war is neither glamorous nor fun. There are no winners, only losers. There are no good wars, with the following exceptions: The American Revolution, World War II, and the Star Wars Trilogy. If you'd like to learn more about war, there's lots of books in your local library, many of them with cool, gory pictures.

It's just hard not to listen to TV: it's spent so much more time raising us than you have.

America's health care system is second only to Japan... Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, ... well all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky stars we don't live in Paraguay!

Remember that postcard Grandpa sent us from Florida of that alligator biting that woman's bottom? That's right, we all thought it was hilarious. But it turns out we were wrong. That alligator was sexually harrassing that woman.

(Captain Tennille) Oh, Simpson, you're like the son I never had. (Homer) And you're like the father I never visit.

Homer) Hey Marge, where's that metal deally you use to, dig stuff. (Marge) You mean a spoon? (Homer) Yeh yeh give give give.


so many...its hard to choose.

-Alfan

*possibly my favorite

I am disrespectful to dirt - mr. sparkles

although i think family guy is a much much much better show for being funny.

"what part of diddy mao do you not understand?" - Bart

"Duffman thrust. OH YEAH! OH!"

I bent my wookie - ralph

I got a valentine and it says I Choo-choo-choose you, and theres a picture of a train - ralph

_________
teh wiggums are win.

Mr. Sparkle: "Get out of my way, all of you! This is no place for loafers. Join me or die. Can you do any less?"

"The goggles, they do nothing!" -McBain Playing Radioactive Man

Timmy - "I have a crazy friend that says eating meat is wrong."
Troy McClure - "He's not crazy, just ignorant."

Homer - "Stick up for yourself poindexter"

Milhouse - "MOM! Barts cussing and smoking."

Ralph - "This tastes like Grandma."

Oops, almost forgot:

Willie - "I've been wrestling wolves ever since you were sucking on your mothers teet." (quite possibly the best simpsons episode ever)

Milhouse - "Ladies, Ladies, theres plenty of Milhouse to go 'round!"

Homer - "....and I'm not easily impressed. LOOK! A BLUE CAR!"

Other: "Shut up brain, or Ill stab you with a Q-tip" - Homer

If you don't like your job you dont strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed, thats the American way. (Homer)

"oh, my beloved pornography!" -krusty

I may not have this exactly correct..

Ned Flanders: ".. and Harry Potter and friends went to hell for practicing witch craft."

Rod & Todd: Yay!

I am evil homer! I am evil homer!

Cleetus (to Homer): Wow! You are good enough to be one of those TV queers.

Marge: Where the HELL is that soothing music coming from?

Lisa: "Can I sit here"
Comic book guy: "Yes. If you answer me these questions three.. Question the first."

Lisa: "Nevermind"

Bart: "mom, these (forgot) suck
Marge: "bart, where do you get that language?"
Homer on the phone: "ya moe, that was the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.....Oh, gotta go, my damn wiener kids are listening!"

Durew wrote:oh and this one

Mr. Burns: "Smithers, who is that man?"
Smithers: "Thats Homer Simpson, sir."

My favorite turn on this oft repeated one was:
Mr. Burns: "Smithers, who is that man?"
Smithers: "Thats Homer Simpson, sir. All the recent events in your life have involved him."

But in the end, my favorite of all time was:
Hi super nintendo Chamers!
-Ralph Wiggum to Superintendent Chamers

Willie being interogated by the police force, puts one of his legs over the other, camera pans away and all you see is shadow (the viewer anyway)

Chief Wiggum: If you do that again, I will be forced to shoot you

Homer..Just before he eats the "Forbidden Donut" and is comdemed to hell ruled by The Dvil Flanders..

.."Mmmmmm..Sacralicious"

From "Treehouse of Horror 4"

miir wrote:"There's nary an animal alive who can outrun a greased scotsman"

So true

Homer : " DOH"

Being a business owner, Ive come to appreciate this quote as one of the best ever:

Mr Burns: "Morons. Pathetic morons under my employ, stealing my precious money."

Ned Flanders: But did ya have to salt the earth so nothing would ever grow there again?

Homer: Hehe...yeah

Homer "No beer and TV make Homer go crazy!"

Chief Wiggum "Alright people back off nothing to see here, OH HOLY, EVERYONE EVERYONE LOOK, plane reckage, come on come on crowd arround!"

Ralph "Daddy, she touched my No-no zone"

few funny ones i didnt see figured id post..

Homer: "In this house we obey the laws of thermodynamics!!!"

Last Sunday's episode had a Krusty doll that talked when you squeezed it.

*squeeze*
"I'm anatomicly correct! Go ahead and take a peek"!

*squeeze*
"I wonder what mommy's medicine tastes like"!


Ralph knocks on the door.
"Can Lisa come out to play with her hands up"?

"Ummmm, doughnuts....." - Homer

Family guy > simpsons. Does it still come on?