VeeshanVault

noel wrote:Speaking of retarded email, I got one the other day from SOE asking me if I wanted to resub for SWG.

Dear sir,

REQUEST FOR URGENT BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP " STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL".
Firstly, I must solicit your strictest confidentiality in this
transaction.This is by virtue of its nature as being utterly
CONFIDENTIAL and "TOP SECRET."Though I know that a transaction of this
magnitude will make anyone apprehensive and worried, but I am assuring
you that all will be well at the end of then day. We have decided to
contact you first by your email due to the urgency of this transaction,
as we have been reliably informed that it will take at least two to
three weeks for a normal post to reach you. So we decided it is
best using the email.
Let me start by first introducing myself properly to you. I am
CHIEF.ERIC BOKONDO, a senior official in the Nigerian National Petroluem
Corporation and I head a Three-man tender board in charge of Contracts
Awards and payment Approvals. I came to know of you in my search for a
reliable and reputable person to handle a very confidential
business transaction which involves the transfer of a huge sum of money
to a foreign account requiring maximum confidence. I and my colleagues
are top officials of the Federal Government Contract Review Panel.Our
duties include evaluation,vetting, approval for payment of contract
jobs one for the NNPC,etc. In order to commence this business,we
solicit
for your assistance to enable us transfer into your account the said
funds.
The source of this funds is as follows: During the last military regime
here in Nigeria, this committee awarded a contract of
S$400,000,000.00(Four Hundred Million United States Dollars) to five
construction firms on behalf of the Petroleum Ministry for the
supply,construction and installation of Oil Pipeline from Warri to
PortHarcourt.During this process my colleagues and I decided amongst
ourselves to deliberately over-inflate the total contract sum to
US$431,500,000.00 (Four Hundred and Thirty One Million Five Hundred
Thousand United States Dollars) with the main intention of
sharing the remaining sum of US$31,500,000.00 (Thirty One Million Five
Hundred Thousand United States Dollars)amongst ourselves. The Federal
Government of Nigeria has since approved the sum of US$431,500,000.00
(Four Hundred and Thirty One Million, Five Hundred Thousand United
States Dollars) for us as the contract sum, and the sum of
US$400,000,000.00 (Four Hundred Million United States Dollars) has also
been paid to the foreign contractors concerned as contract entitlements
for the contract done, but since each of the companies is entitled
to S$80,000,000.00 only, we are now left with US$31,500,000.00 balance
in the account which we intend to transfer abroad into a safe and
reliable account to be disbursed amongst ourselves, butby virtue of our
positions as civil servants and members of this panel,we cannot do this
by ourselves, as we are prohibited by the ?Code of Conduct Bureau?
(Civil Service Laws) from opening / operating foreign accounts in our
names, making it impossible for us to acquire the money in our names. I
have, therefore, been mandated as a matter of trust by my colleagues in
the panel to look for an overseas partner into whose account we would
transfer the sum of US$31,500,000.00(Thirty One Million FiveHundred
Thousand United States Dollars), hence we are writing you this letter.
My colleagues and I have agreed that if your company can act as the
beneficiary of this funds on our behalf, you or your company will
retain 30% of the total amount of US$31,500,000.00 (Thirty One Million
Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars), while 60% will be for us
(members of this panel) and the remaining 10% will be used in
offsetting alldebts/expenses incurred (both local and foreign) in the
cause of this transfer.Needless to say,the trust reposed on you at this
juncture is enormous.In return we demand your complete honesty and
trust. You must however, NOTE that this transaction will be strictly
based on the following terms and conditions as we have stated below, as
we have heard confirmed cases of business associates running away with
funds kept in their custody when it finally arrive their accounts. A
very good and recent example is the one of Mr. Peter Hopwood, the
President of Mileage Trading and Investment Company at Number 121, West
55th Street, 21st Floor, New York 10022,and former Chairman of OMPADEC
(Mr. Patrick Opia),who we were reliably informed that after
theagreement
between both partners in which he was to take 15% of the money,while
the
remaining 85% for Nigerian Officials. With all the required documents
signed, the money was duly transferred into his account, only to be
disappointed on their arrival in New York and were informed that
Mr.Peter Hopwood was no longer on that address, while his telephone and
fax numbers have been re-allocated to somebody else. This was how they
lost US$18.5 Million to Mr.Hopwood. This is a very recent story
here in my country and everybody is aware of this, some of the
officials decided to cry out and face the law, because they felt they
had lost too much to a stranger, while the Chairman of OMPADEC (Mr.
Patrick Opia) is hiding in a foreign country.So right now we are taking
all precautionary measures to guard against re-occurrence of such act
in
our case. This is why we have decided that this transaction will be
based completely on the following:
(a). Our conviction of your transparent honesty and diligence.
(b). That you would treat this transaction with utmost secrecy and
confidentiality.
(c). That upon receipt of the funds, you will promptly release our
share
(60%) on demand after you have removed your 30% and all expenses have
been settled.
(d). You must be ready to produce us with enough information about
yourself to put our minds at rest.
Please, note that this transaction is 100% legal and risk free and we
hope to conclude the business in Seven Bank working days from the date
of receipt of the necessary information and requirement from you.
Please, acknowledge the receipt of this letter using my email address.
I will bring you into the complete picture of the transaction when I
have heard from you.Your urgent response will be highly appreciated as
we are already behind schedule for this financial quarter.Thank you and
God bless.
Yours faithfully,

Chief Eric Bokondo

Trias wrote:this is the first piece of trash mail i've received honestly in my 4 years of having my comcast.net account...i thought it was funny/retarded so i'll share


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Attn:-The President/C.E.O
Sir,
I am a financial consultant based in West Africa.I got your contact information under privileged authority in the believed hope that you may be able to assist my cause which is rather, extremely confidential and urgent.

MY client Mr. Lemkan Taylor(Brother of the ousted Liberian President,Mr.Charles Taylor)he has $25,000,000.00 with a private security company for safekeeping in Europe.

It was shipped there under very strict means well disguised as African art materials meant for exhibition at the heat of the present Administration probe of the family.

He is willing to offer you 25% of the total fund for your participation to assist him transfer this fund to your country or any bank account of your wish.

He wishes to invest in a stable economy, his interest is in companies with potentials for rapid growth in long terms. My client is interested in placing part of her funds in your company if your country allows foreign investment.

Thank you for the pains taken in reading through this mail and await your response through my e-mail address.

Yours Faithfully,
Mr.Gabriel Obaseki

Adelrune Argenti wrote:I hope that someday my Nigerian Prince will come...