Favorite quotes

miir · Post by **miir** » January 8, 2003, 1:48 pm

640K ought to be enough for anybody - Bill Gates

Shaerra · Post by **Shaerra** » January 8, 2003, 2:05 pm

My grandmother always said, "Why buy the cow, when you get the sex for free".

-Jason Lee, Mallrats

Chidoro · Post by **Chidoro** » January 8, 2003, 2:42 pm

Oh yeah, well here's two words for you - Shut the Fuck Up

DeNiro- Midnight Run

Kylere · Post by **Kylere** » January 8, 2003, 4:03 pm

Hmm I have a few, most recent are from Kevin Smith movies, since I bought all the DVD's last month and vegged on them.

Chasing Amy has several scenes of memorable quotes:
Banky: Alright, now see this? This is a four-way road, OK? And dead in the center is a crisp, new, hundred dollar bill. Now, at the end of each of these streets are four people, OK? Are you following?
Holden: Yeah.
Banky: Good. Over here, we have a male-affectionate, easy to get along with, non-political agenda lesbian. Down here, we have a man-hating, angry as fuck, agenda of rage, bitter dyke. Over here, we got Santa Claus, and up here the Easter Bunny. Which one is going to get to the hundred dollar bill first?
Holden: What is this supposed to prove?
Banky: No, I'm serious. This is a serious exercise. It's like an SAT question. Which one is going to get to the hundred dollar bill first? The male-friendly lesbian, the man-hating dyke, Santa Claus, or the Easter bunny?
Holden: The man-hating dyke.
Banky: Good. Why?
Holden: I don't know.
Banky: Because the other three are figments of your fucking imagination!

Clerks:
Randal Graves: My mom's been fuckin' a dead guy for 30 years. I call him dad.
Dante Hicks: My girlfriend's sucked 37 dicks!

Dogma:
Rufus: People only want to hear the good shit...life eternal, a place in God's heaven...but as soon as you hear that you're gettin' all this good shit from a black Jesus, you freak. And that, my friends, is called hypocrisy. A black man can steal your stereo, but he can't be your savior.
Jay: We figure an abortion clinic is a good place to meet loose women. Why else would they be there unless they like to fuck?
Rufus: Hell, the tubby coat-wearin' motherfucker's got tits, that sure as hell doesn't make him a woman!

Jay and Silent Bob:
Jay: I am the master of the clit.
Banky: That's what the Internet is for, slandering others anonymously.
Jay: Eew, dude, she had 70's bush. Second rule of the road should be "Trim that shit".

Mort · Post by **Mort** » January 8, 2003, 4:16 pm

The only chance you have is us, why piss in our assholes? - Furor

I'll never forget that one....heh

Gurugurumaki · Post by **Gurugurumaki** » January 8, 2003, 4:30 pm

Yoo get kirled wark yoor doggie~ Heat

Shaerra · Post by **Shaerra** » January 8, 2003, 6:27 pm

Kevin Smith is my favorite Director... I have all of his movies except "An evening with Kevin Smith".

Some other favorite lines from Smith movies:

Dante: I'm stuck in this pit, earning less than slave wages, working on my day off, dealing with every backward fuck on the planet, the goddamn steel shutters are locked all day, I smell like shoe polish, I've got an ex-girlfriend who's catatonic after fucking a dead guy, and my present girlfriend has sucked thirty-six dicks.

Randal: Thirty-seven.

---------------

Brodie: One time my cousin Walter got this cat stuck up his ass, true story, he bought it at our local mall so the whole fiasco wound up on the news. It was embarrassing for my relatives and all but the next week he did again, a different cat, same results, complete with another trip to the emergancy room. So I run into him a week later in the mall and he's buying another cat. So I say to him, "Jesus, Walt what are you doing? You know you're just going to get this cat stuck up your ass." And he said to me, "Brodie? How else am I going to get the gerbil out?" My cousin was a weird guy.

---------------

Jay: Phase one, first you take a run at LaFours with a sock full of quarters, I'd do it, but I pulled my back out humping your mom last night. Nooch.

---------------

Jay (to Willam): I'll tell you what you need is a phatty boom batty blunt, and then I guarantee you'll see a sailboat, an ocean, and maybe even some of them big tittied mermaids doing some of that lesbian shit.

---------------

Jay: So why the long face, Horse? Banky on the rag?

Holden: I'm just having some girl troubles.

Jay: Bitch pressing charges? I get that a lot.

---------------

Jay: All you motherfuckers are gonna pay, You are the ones who are the ball-lickers. We're gonna fuck your mothers while you watch and cry like little bitches. Once we get to Hollywood and find those Miramax fucks who are making that movie, we're gonna make 'em eat our shit, then shit out our shit, then eat their shit which is made up of our shit that we made 'em eat. Then you're all fucking next.

---------------

Really, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back is full of excellent quotes.

Soreali · Post by **Soreali** » January 8, 2003, 7:31 pm

Chidoro wrote:Oh yeah, well here's two words for you - Shut the Fuck Up

DeNiro- Midnight Run

Best movie.

mine would be "Satisfaction is the death of desire"

Jice Virago · Post by **Jice Virago** » January 8, 2003, 8:13 pm

Two best movies all time for quotes are Pulp Fiction and Blues Brothers.

"Im gonna go get some hard pipe hitting negros and were gonna go to work on the homes up here with a pair of pliers and a blowtorch. You hear me talking you hillbilly punk? Im going to get mideavel on your ass!"

"Illinois Nazis? I hate Illinoise Nazis"

"The motherfucker who said that never had to scoop up pieces of brain and skull on account of your dumb ass."

"Disco Pants and haircuts. This Mall has everything."

"I hid this uncomfortable hunk of metal up my ass for 6 years. And now, young man, I give it to you."

"We're on a mission from god."

Millie · Post by **Millie** » January 8, 2003, 9:21 pm

"I no exploit use."

~Gurugurumaki (the original player, not the board troll)

Masekle · Post by **Masekle** » January 8, 2003, 10:43 pm

One of the things you learn after years of dealing with drugs is... You can turn your back on a person, but never turn your back on a drug. Especially when its waving a razor sharp hunting knife in your eye.

Trek · Post by **Trek** » January 8, 2003, 11:32 pm

good, bad.....im the guy with the gun

Masekle · Post by **Masekle** » January 8, 2003, 11:55 pm

OH GOD.... Did you eat all this acid?

Mort · Post by **Mort** » January 9, 2003, 12:30 am

"You know, I think it's all that black semen been pumped so far up your ass, now it's backed in your brain and comin out your mouth...." - Nice Guy Eddie(RESERVOIR DOGS)

Xaem · Post by **Xaem** » January 9, 2003, 2:59 am

This fucking thread sucks mis-shapen donkey cock.

Bratly · Post by **Bratly** » January 9, 2003, 5:01 am

"Don't kiss me! How many dicks you suck tonight?"
-tony soprano

-brad

Drewno · Post by **Drewno** » January 9, 2003, 5:21 am

Dirty Harry...

"I know what you're thinking...Did he fire six bullets - or just five? With all the excitement I kind of lost track of it myself. This here is a .44 magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world. One shot could blow your head clean off. So you have to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well...Do you, punk?"

Dregor Thule · Post by **Dregor Thule** » January 9, 2003, 6:14 am

"This is my sandbox. I'm not allowed to play in the deep end, that's where we found the leprechaun. He tells me to burn things!" - Ralph Wiggum

Ennia · Post by **Ennia** » January 9, 2003, 12:58 pm

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he doesn't exist.

Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!

Looks like somebody has a case of the Mondays!

You keep using that word , i do not think it means what you think it means

Fairweather Pure · Post by **Fairweather Pure** » January 9, 2003, 1:00 pm

We know Iraq has chemical and biological weapons they are hiding. We still have the reciepts!

--George Bush

Shaerra · Post by **Shaerra** » January 9, 2003, 2:37 pm

Fairweather Pure wrote:We know Iraq has chemical and biological weapons they are hiding. We still have the reciepts!

--George Bush

ROFL!

Drolgin Steingrinder · January 9, 2003, 4:09 pm

I'm so horny the crack of dawn better be careful around me!
-- Tom Waits

Gordiken the Wicked · Post by **Gordiken the Wicked** » January 9, 2003, 4:29 pm

Doc Holliday - "I'm your Huckleberry" from Tombstone

Winnow · Post by **Winnow** » January 10, 2003, 1:06 am