From: the Onion
GREEN BAY, WI—His suit still smeared with the entrails and blood of his broadcasting partner, Fox color commentator Troy Aikman told reporters Monday that the sub-zero temperatures during Sunday's NFC title game necessitated gutting open play-by-by announcer Joe Buck, dumping his bowels onto the floor of the booth, and climbing inside the carcass late in the third quarter. "With the temperatures continuing to fall throughout the game, there was really little else I could do to avoid hypothermia," Aikman said, noting that his hands were so cold he was afraid of cutting his fingers off when making the incision from Buck's groin and drawing the knife up to the sternum during a TV timeout. "I hated to sacrifice Joe, but I was afraid for my life." Aikman said his colleague's sacrifice was noble in the extreme, but noted he'd thought Buck smelled bad on the outside.
SW reference ftw! I can actually see Aikman doing this....
