http://www.theonion.com/content/news_br ... y_sure_benTeammates Pretty Sure Ben Roethlisberger Can No Longer Remember Their Names
PITTSBURGH— After Ben Roethlisberger repeatedly addressed his Pittsburgh teammates as "dude," "Mac," and "you there" for an entire practice session last Monday, the quarterback's fellow Steelers concluded that the oft-concussed Pro Bowler is unable to remember their names. "I walked up to him in the locker room and said, 'Hey Ben,' and he responded, 'Hey...brother,'"said a teammate who spoke on the condition of continued anonymity. "He only used a first name once, and that was when he was talking to Troy Polamalu. And he kept calling him Randy." When asked if he would be ready for Sunday's game, Roethlisberger said that as the third-string goalie, there is only so much he could do.
Big Ben's Mellon
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Big Ben's Mellon
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- Aardor
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
Hahahaha, the line about Polamalu being called Randy made me laugh out loud at work.
- Kilmoll the Sexy
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
Bastards. At least in his dementia he can look down at that big assed ring and say "hey, I must have won a Super Bowl or something"
meanwhile, I dug up this pic of Jay Cutler in his playoff gear
meanwhile, I dug up this pic of Jay Cutler in his playoff gear
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
Kilmoll the Sexy wrote:Bastards. At least in his dementia he can look down at that big assed ring and say "hey, I must have won a Super Bowl or something"
meanwhile, I dug up this pic of Jay Cutler in his playoff gear
Now that is just rude.
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- Kilmoll the Sexy
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
I am hoping that hit scared their line into actually protecting him.
Re: Big Ben's Mellon
its OK Canno... one year your Broncorpses might see the post season again: it happened to Winnow's Cards so it can happen to you too!!!
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
Easy there sparky. The Broncos may suck now, but 10 years of sucking ain't so bad as sucking badly over the entire lifespan of the franchise (save this year). The Broncos were undermined by terrible defensive draft selections and poor free agent signings.
The senility of Shanahan done shone the strongest during the last several seasons.
The senility of Shanahan done shone the strongest during the last several seasons.
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
I will be kinda funny if the Suns end up being the last of the big three sports in Arizona to win a championship.
Re: Big Ben's Mellon
Poor defensive decisions? DJ williams is the shizzle my nizzle.
And wow, spinal cord concussion...wtf...that sounds fucken painful. That dude is a tank...he got hit by a car before for god's sake and still came back...or, its like the onion said, and he's all kinds of dumb and just goes where folks point.
And wow, spinal cord concussion...wtf...that sounds fucken painful. That dude is a tank...he got hit by a car before for god's sake and still came back...or, its like the onion said, and he's all kinds of dumb and just goes where folks point.
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
Gotta love the Onion.
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
Not bashing DJ, Kluden. Aside from him and Champ though....
Granted, Woodyard and Larsen have a huge upside, but that is easily offset by the missed-tackle-helmet-projectile known as Nate Webster. Boss Bailey? Ugh. Dwayne Robertson...blech. No safeties to speak of either...and Dre Bly....oy
The new coach certainly has his work cut out for him!
Granted, Woodyard and Larsen have a huge upside, but that is easily offset by the missed-tackle-helmet-projectile known as Nate Webster. Boss Bailey? Ugh. Dwayne Robertson...blech. No safeties to speak of either...and Dre Bly....oy
The new coach certainly has his work cut out for him!
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
That last game for the Cards was a gimme. When the other team's QB throws you the ball 5 times it's hard to lose the game. Those throws were terrible. I doubt McNabb will do the same. Arizona gets another home playoff game, but they're gonna have to earn the trip to Tampa.
I tell it like a true mackadelic.
Founder of Ixtlan - the SCUM of Veeshan.
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
Xyun wrote:That last game for the Cards was a gimme. When the other team's QB throws you the ball 5 times it's hard to lose the game. Those throws were terrible. I doubt McNabb will do the same. Arizona gets another home playoff game, but they're gonna have to earn the trip to Tampa.
Nothing's a gimmie in the playoffs.
The Cards shut down the #2 and #3 rushing offenses in Atlanta and Carolina. (60ish and 70sh yards total rushing yards for those top rushing teams the past two games)
Jake did have a really bad game. That doesn't mean the Panthers would have won though. It would have been closer...but that goes back the Sueven's theory of changing the stats for every game...you just can't do that. That's why they play the games. Check the time of possession for the last two games as well. The Cards have been ball hogs. It's great!
I'm still feeling a close, entertaining game between Philly and Arizona.
PS: McNabb is entirely capable of having horrendous games. He's had them in the past, in big games sometimes as well.
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
The top 3 defenses in the league are left, plus a Cinderella story known as the Arizona Cardinals. The Cardinals are entirely capable of having horrendous games, too.
Good luck.
Good luck.
Make love, fuck war, peace will save us.
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
I am almost hoping to see a Pitt-Arizona Super Bowl. The prospect of James Harrison and Lamarr Woodley going against a fumble-prone statue of a QB could be extreme entertainment.
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
"It's like these guys take pride in being ignorant." - Barack Obama
Go Blue!
Go Blue!
Re: Big Ben's Mellon
I hope the Steelers beat Baltimore. Baltimore bores me to tears. If Arizona doesn't pull out the win, an all PA Superbowl would be cool with me.
Re: Big Ben's Mellon
Drive time from Pittsburgh to Philly: about 5.5 hours.
Drive time from Philly to Bal'more: about 1.5 hours.
If Philly wins against arizona, their opponent will either be cross state, or "hop skip and a jump" down 95, rivalry.
Drive time from Philly to Bal'more: about 1.5 hours.
If Philly wins against arizona, their opponent will either be cross state, or "hop skip and a jump" down 95, rivalry.
Re: Big Ben's Mellon
My cousin and i were discussing the hilarity of a Pennsylvania only Super Bowl that would be played in Tampa.Kluden wrote:Drive time from Pittsburgh to Philly: about 5.5 hours.
Drive time from Philly to Bal'more: about 1.5 hours.
If Philly wins against arizona, their opponent will either be cross state, or "hop skip and a jump" down 95, rivalry.
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
I would so much love for them to just fuck everyone that bought tickets already and announce they are moving the superbowl to the Penn State Stadium. Would never happen tho!Truant wrote:My cousin and i were discussing the hilarity of a Pennsylvania only Super Bowl that would be played in Tampa.Kluden wrote:Drive time from Pittsburgh to Philly: about 5.5 hours.
Drive time from Philly to Bal'more: about 1.5 hours.
If Philly wins against arizona, their opponent will either be cross state, or "hop skip and a jump" down 95, rivalry.
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
halftime and Arizona is spanking Philly. Fitzgerald is a beast. I'm pretty surprised to be honest.
I tell it like a true mackadelic.
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Re: Big Ben's Mellon
I thought this thread was about horses.